Hey, Why The Long Week?

Maine, winter, humor, Modern PhilosopherThe season hasn’t even officially begun yet, but it’s already been a miserable winter, Modern Philosophers.

I was texting a friend yesterday, and admitted that it had been a long, stressful week.  When she asked why I felt that way, I realized that I didn’t have enough data in my monthly plan to send her a proper reply.

So I figured I’d just blog about it.

As I’ve previously established, winter in Maine begins on October 1, even though the rest of the country (foolishly) claims that’s still early autumn.

This week, though, Snow Miser really kicked things into high gear.  To the point that even winter deniers would have to take notice.  It was absolutely frigid, with temperatures below the voting age.  Then we had the first snow of the season that required shoveling.

Actually this one necessitated shoveling and scraping, since freezing rain fell on top of the snow overnight.  So I was out there at 6AM, scraping the ice and snow off the driveway, and then using the shovel to clear the ice shards.

It’s a great workout, but after an hour of that, my entire body ached, so having to sit at a desk and work for the next eight hours proved to be a bit of a challenge.

In the silver lining department, at least driving in that first snow was not an issue.  Ever since I leased the RAV4, my paralyzing fear of driving in snow has vanished.  It’s good to have one less anxiety in my life.

Just about a million others left to deal with at this point…

I went for a run this morning, even though it was only 15 degrees, because I’d clearly lost my mind.  Maybe my grey matter had frozen while I’d slept due to the weather.

Maine, winter, humor, Modern PhilosopherOnce I got out there, I immediately regretted my decision.  Sometimes, it’s easy to adapt to the cold.  After I begin to sweat, it just feels like any other day, and I can run without any issue or interruption.

Today, however, there was a bitter wind to go along with the sub-freezing temperature.

At one point, it felt like my left eye was frozen from the wind.  I’m pretty sure that was just my hampered mind playing tricks on me, but I wouldn’t put anything past my nemesis Snow Miser at this point.

The wind had no trouble penetrating all my layers, to the point that my internal organs felt like they had been put on ice.

Needless to say, I cut my run short.  After all, the river was beginning to freeze, and I worried that if I stayed out there much longer, I would be next.

The fact that it gets dark right after lunch now (okay, perhaps that’s a slight exaggeration, but not by much) doesn’t help things, either.  It gives me the impression that I’m working well into the night, which makes my days seem impossibly long.

Once I get home, I’m exhausted and miserable.  There’s no one there to cheer me up, or talk to about my day, and I’m too tired to write, so I just crank up the heat and veg on the couch watching TV until I gather enough energy to climb the stairs to go to bed.

Maine, winter, humor, Modern PhilosopherIt’s no way to live, and it puts me in a grumbly mood.  What I’d really like to do is just hibernate until spring mercifully arrives, but for some reason, it’s not acceptable for humans to get all animalistic in that manner.

Don’t worry, Modern Philosophers.  I’m not going to allow my Post Traumatic Snow Disorder to get the best of me.  I’m combating my crappy mood with some very effective chili therapy.

I’ve whipped up another batch of my world famous chili, the perfect meal for this weather, and it is simmering on the stove.  The scent is currently wafting through The House on the Hill, and has already improved my mood exponentially.

So, yeah, it was a long week, but now it’s chili time.  I think things are going to be okay…

How are you handling the bitter cold?

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The Other End Of The Tunnel

short story, love, dating, humor, Modern PhilosopherSally and Justin walked hand in hand along the path that lined the river.

It was an overcast autumn afternoon in Maine, and Sally was bundled up accordingly.  Justin, on the other hand, wore a light jacket and his ever present Yankee cap.

“Aren’t you cold?” Sally asked through chattering teeth as she moved even closer to him in hopes of using some of his body heat to hold off frostbite.

“I’m always warm when I’m holding your hand,” he replied and kissed the top of the wool hat that covered her head.

Sally blushed despite the cold.  “You say the sweetest things for a guy dumb enough to drag his girlfriend out for a walk on an afternoon like this!”

She smiled when she said it, though, so Justin just squeezed her hand like he always did when he wanted her to know he loved her.

“As you know, I run along this path five days a week,” Justin stated the obvious, but it was clearly a set up for whatever he had planned.

“Yes, and I’m so proud of you,” Sally assured him as she rested her head against his shoulder.  “You’ve lost so much weight, you’re healthier, and I have to admit, I don’t mind the view when I’m behind you…”

She made a play of checking out his butt, and giggled.

Justin rolled his eyes and smiled.  “Did you know I picked this as my running route because we went for a walk here on our very first date?”

short story, love, dating, humor, Modern PhilosopherHe stopped and turned to look at the river.  It was bluer than usual this afternoon.

“I didn’t realize that,” Sally admitted as she followed his gaze towards the water.  “What I mean is, I realize we walked along this path on our first date, but I didn’t realize you ran here because of that.”

He leaned down to kiss her.  She wasn’t big on public displays of affection, but she didn’t mind this one.  There was no one else crazy enough to be out on this frigid afternoon, and their closeness provided some much needed warmth.

Justin started walking again, and Sally had to scamper to catch up.  She hadn’t noticed that his kiss had made her weak in the knees.

What in the world was going on?  Before she could ask, Justin spoke up.

“Something weird has happened on my last few runs, and I brought you here today because I wanted to tell you about it, and get your opinion.”

Sally raised an eyebrow to the comment.  “What do you mean by weird?”

Justin shrugged and offered a nervous laugh.  “You know how I’m big on signs and fate?”

“Of course,” she answered with a grin.  “You told me you asked me out because I was the only woman in the bar wearing a Yankees sweatshirt on a night that the Yanks were playing the Sox.  You said it was a sign that you could not possibly ignore.”

short story, love, dating, humor, Modern Philosopher“Well, that and the fact that you were the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen,” Justin confessed.

Sally blushed much deeper this time, and then stood on tiptoes to kiss him.

“You and your words, Mr. Writer…” she swooned.  “Always making the butterflies dance in my stomach.”

He squeezed her hand again, and led her towards the small tunnel looming ahead.

“This path is slightly over half a mile long,” he stated the facts.  “That means I run back and forth at least six times to get in the distance I need.”

“A math whiz, too,” she quipped with a smile.

Justin stopped just before entering the tunnel.  He studied it like he was going to write his dissertation on the structure.

Sally noticed his odd interest in the opening and looked at him with concern.

“What’s going on, Justin?” she asked with just a smattering of fear in her voice.

short story, love, dating, humor, Modern Philosopher“Lately, whenever I pass through this tunnel, I get a weird chill…”

“Maybe that’s because it’s November in Maine, and it’s very cold,” she cut him off and shivered because the chill was back.

Justin shook his head, let go of her hand, and then began to pace parallel to the tunnel’s entrance.  He looked down at his feet, though, as if he were afraid to peer inside.

“It’s not the temperature, Sally,” he corrected her.  “It’s a cold, creepy chill.  I can feel the goose bumps crawling across my body.  And then I get the same thought every time…”

More than slightly freaked out at this point, Sally strode over to her boyfriend, and took his hand.  Then she put her hand to his chin, and tilted his head up so that he was forced to look at her.

“What thought?” she demanded.

“You’re going to think it’s silly…” he dismissed the question, and tried to lower his head again, but Sally kept her hand firmly in place to maintain eye contact.

“Every time I run though this tunnel, I get this feeling that it’s a time machine.”

He looked at her like he expected her to laugh.  Instead, she raised an eyebrow and then stepped into the tunnel.

“I love a good sci-fi story as much as the next gal, but I don’t see anything inside this tunnel to indicate that it’s a machine,” she told him as she ran her hand along its smooth walls.  “There would be buttons, consoles, wires, tubes, maybe a flux capacitor…”

short story, love, dating, humor, Modern PhilosopherJustin crossed his arms over his chest, and stared at her intently, like he was trying to figure out how to take her response.  Was she mocking him?  Did she believe him?

“I can’t explain it, but I get this sense that when I come out the other side, my life will have completely changed.  That I’d somehow be different, or just nothing will ever be the same.  It’s gotten so intense that my heart rate goes through the roof, and I worry that my FitBit is going to explode.”

He began to nervously pace again.

She responded by extending her arm and wiggling her fingers.  “Come here,” she ordered.

He tentatively walked over, and took her hand.

“What you’re describing sounds more like a portal than a time machine,” she explained as she squeezed his hand tightly.  “I think it’s just your amazing writer’s imagination taking control of your brain, but I’ll walk through this tunnel with you as often as it takes for you to feel comfortable.  Okay?”

He nodded, but didn’t move.  “I know it sounds crazy, but the idea just takes hold of my mind and body.  I can’t shake the thought that one of these times, I’m going to emerge from this tunnel, and find that my life has completely changed.”

“I believe you, babe,” she assured him and tried to nudge him forward.  “I’m here with you, so if anything is going to change, it’s going to happen to both of us.  I promise.”

She nodded to assure him he was safe.

He squeezed her hand in return, and took a step towards the other end of the tunnel.

Sally smiled and let out a low sigh of relief.  She wasn’t sure what was going on with Justin, but it tore her to pieces to know he was in any sort of distress.

short story, love, dating, humor, Modern PhilosopherThey were halfway through the tunnel when Justin suddenly stopped.  He whole body shook.  He let go of Sally’s hand, and staggered sideways towards the wall.

“What’s happening?” she questioned, and her words echoed off the tunnel walls.

“I’m feeling it again,” he blurted nervously.  “Something is happening!”

He dropped to his knees, and she rushed to him.  By the time she arrived, Justin had managed to pull himself up to one knee.

“Are you okay?  Say something!  Please…”

Justin looked up at her.  A sudden calm came over him.

Sally stared down at him in a panic, unsure of what to make of the situation.

Justin held out his hand to reveal a box.  He then used his other hand to open it and reveal the engagement ring.

“Will you marry me?” he asked as a charming smile slowly brightened his face.  “Will you walk out of this tunnel as my fiancee, and change my life forever?”

She nodded because she was too overwhelmed with emotions to form any words, or even make a sound.

So she kissed him, forgetting how cold and confused she was, but prepared to keep her promise to be right there with him when his life changed forever…

Posted in Humor, Love | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Running To Stay Warm

running, health, fitness, Maine, humor, Modern PhilosopherMaine is on a different schedule from the rest of the country when it comes to the dog days of winter, Modern Philosophers.

The 182 Days of Terror, otherwise known as Winter in Maine, began forty days ago on October 1.  We got our first snow yesterday, and when I woke up this morning, it was 21 degrees.

So I did the only sane thing: I stayed in bed under the warm covers!  Cali was curled up on my chest, purring up a storm, and I figured I would just wait out the cold.

The next time I checked the temperature, it was 19 degrees.  My strategy had backfired.  Time for a new plan.  I jumped out of bed, bundled up in my winter running gear, and headed out for a run before the mercury slid any further below the freezing mark!

As you can see from the above photo, I don’t fool around when it comes to running in the cold.  Not only did I wear my mask, but I also had on a second running coat, gloves, a long sleeved shirt, and long running spandex under my cold weather running pants.

People have told me I’m crazy to run when it’s that cold, but I can’t think of a better way to get warm.  Once I start sweating, I can’t tell that it’s below freezing.  All I know is that my heart it pumping, my blood is flowing, and all I want to do is collect steps.

This morning’s run was unusual in that the smell of fire was in the air.  Last night, there was a huge fire along my running path.  The roof of a new restaurant, that was still under construction, burst into flames around 5:00.  I could see the fire as I crossed the bridge on my way home from work, traffic was backed up, and there were flashing lights everywhere.

running, health, fitness, Maine, humor, Modern PhilosopherThis morning, the path behind the restaurant was iced over from the run off of the water used to fight the blaze.

I stopped to look at the charred remains of the building, which was still standing, but the roof had collapsed.

A sad reminder that life can change in the blink of an eye.

I eventually got back to running.  Despite the temperatures, I made sure to do a long run because I wanted to feel alive after a long, stressful week.  Sometimes, I can convince myself that I’m running off the stress.  Other times, like this morning, I want to run to prove that the week hadn’t gotten the better of me.

I was still the idiot running in the frigid Maine morning.  Always a good sign.

When I started this running program two and a half years ago, I used to give up running once it got too cold.  Now, I keep going through the snow and frigid temperatures.  Like I said earlier, it’s a great way to get warm.

Sure, conventional wisdom might be to stay inside, crank up the heat, and put on some weight with comfort food to add a layer or two of fat for warmth.

I used to do that every winter, and I’d hate the rotund version of me who’d emerge from The House on the Hill once the snow had finally cleared, and the sun returned.

running, health, fitness, Maine, humor, Modern PhilosopherAnd so, I run through whatever Snow Miser decides to throw at me.  After all, I’m a Mainer now, and a little snow isn’t supposed to deter me from doing anything.

Besides, the river hasn’t even frozen over yet, which means we aren’t close to the coldest days winter has to offer…

Do you change up your workout routine for the winter?

Posted in Fitness, Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Run Like You’re An Hour Younger

running, health, fitness, humor, Modern PhilosopherDid you remember to turn back the clocks, Modern Philosophers?

While I’ve never been a fan of this state mandated form of time travel, I really don’t have much to do to comply with it.  All the clocks in my house adjust themselves, except for the one on the microwave.

I just go to bed, and when I wake up, I’m an hour younger than I’m supposed to be.  Truth be told, I don’t even notice the difference.

Seems like a total waste of time travel, but I don’t make the laws.  That’s why I have my own time machine, and use it for journeys of much greater than sixty minutes.

I woke up this morning, and was confused that my FitBit said it was so early, even though it felt like I’d slept for a very long time.

It took a moment to clear away the cobwebs, and remember that whole “turn back the clock” thing.

Once I was awake, aware, and had adjusted my inner flux capacitor, I decided to go for my run.  Might as well take advantage of the extra daylight to enjoy the world around me as I left a glistening layer of sweat in my wake.

Even though yesterday was my long run, I hadn’t really felt it because I’d spent the entire run mentally plotting my new writing project.

This morning, I had fresh legs, strong lungs, and the mentality of someone one hour younger than he truly was!

running, health, fitness, humor, Modern PhilosopherSo I stormed the river walk like I had something to prove…or an extra hour to kill.  It’s really hard to tell at this point.

Regardless, I had an excellent run.  Along the way, I met the pretty dog walker with whom I always share a flirtatious hello.

This morning, however, since I was feeling an hour younger, I engaged her in two long conversations.  When one person runs, and the other walks, you tend to meet up again on the return run.

Turns out we are both from New York, so we talked about our home state, and then got into the serious stuff…our under performing New York football teams.

I don’t usually chat up people on my runs, and I certainly don’t strike up conversations with attractive strangers, but the time change plays games with my mind.

I really can’t be held accountable for what I do as my body adjusts to time travel.

I did notice that there were very few people out on the river walk this morning.  They were probably home, trying to adapt to the journey back in time.  Unlike me, a seasoned time traveler, they don’t realize that the best thing to do is to go about your day as if nothing out of the ordinary has happened.

After all, time is relative.  It has nothing to do with the numbers flashing up at you from a device on your wrist.

If you feel younger than usual, seize that moment and take it out for a spin.

running, health, fitness, humor, Modern PhilosopherAfter all, we don’t know how many hours we have left on this big, blue marble.  I say we should treat them all like we’ve just awakened from a journey through time.

Make the most of that extra hour today.  It sure would be a shame to waste it…

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Writers Inspiring Writers

writing, blogging, humor, Modern PhilosopherOne of my favorite things about blogging, Modern Philosophers, is interacting with you.  I love when you comment on my posts, and we get to have a little conversation.

There’s nothing quite like instant feedback to my writing.

What I enjoy even more, though, is when a fellow writer tells me how much she likes one of my posts, and both inspires and encourages me to turn it into something bigger.

That very thing happened this week.  A writer friend, whose feedback and support I truly value, sent me a message about how much she enjoyed The Halloween Party, this year’s Halloween short story.

We got into a conversation about how she’d like to see what happened to these characters, which sparked a memory of an idea I’ve long had for a novel.  We chatted back and forth for a while, she sent me some links for sites looking for short stories, and I updated her on the progress of the TV series I’ve written about my time in college.

Needless to say, once we said goodnight, I was totally hopped up on inspiration.  Not only was my head swimming with ideas to turn The Halloween Party into a novel, but I also fired off an email to my producer to brainstorm some ideas about the TV series.

writing, inspiration, humor, Modern PhilosopherOf course, it’s one thing to have ideas, and something completely different to actually act on them.

For the last couple of days, I’ve been plotting out story ideas.  Like I mentioned earlier, I’ve long had an idea for a novel, and these characters would fit into that concept nicely.

This big turning point was during this morning’s run.  Saturday’s run is always my longest of the week, and I tend to get major mental outlining done when I run.  So this morning, I set off to put in some miles and piece together my snippets of story ideas.

Characters’ names are very important to me.  Since The Halloween Party was intended to only be 1,000 words on my blog, I didn’t put much thought into the male lead’s name.  I just wanted something fancy, so I landed on Sebastian.  I’ll admit, it was probably inspired by a commercial I’d seen for the live version of The Little Mermaid.

My Muse works in mysterious ways.

I was stuck on coming up with a nickname for Sebastian, because I didn’t look forward to typing that name over and over in a novel.  My running route was the perfect place to work out that issue.

Once I cleared that hurdle, further the ideas flowed.  Much like my scripts, these ideas played out in my head like a movie.  I could see the characters, listen to their conversation, see the setting, and watch the way they interacted.

writing, inspiration, humor, Modern PhilosopherAs soon as I was done with my post-run shower, I fired up my laptop and typed up several pages of an outline for the novel.

This all happened because a fellow Modern Philosopher reached out to tell me how much she enjoyed my story.  Inspired by her faith in my writing abilities, I allowed myself to open my mind to the idea that this could be much more than a Halloween blog post.

A warm thank you to my friend who took the time to comment and share her feelings.  And a thank you to all of you for taking the time to read my stories.

Please know that your feedback means so much to me, and I do my best to pay it forward.  Writers inspiring writers.  It warms my heart.  Can you just feel the blog love?

Posted in Humor, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Jokes Not Worthy Of Late Night

monologue jokes, writing, The Nite Show, humor, Modern PhilosopherHappy Sunday, Modern Philosophers!

A new episode of The Nite Show with Danny Cashman aired last night, which means some of my monologue jokes made it onto your television.

The truth is, I write dozens of jokes for every show, and only a few of them can make it onto the air.  That means so many jokes never get a chance to make someone laugh.

Well, I don’t want those jokes to never know the sound of laughter.  So I’m going to share some of my jokes that Danny didn’t select for last night’s show.  If they can make just one of you laugh, then all my hard work did not go for naught.

Without further babbling from me, here’s are some of my monologue jokes deemed not worthy for late night television…

Halloween is on Thursday.  Linus, if you’re sitting in that pumpkin patch, waiting for the Great Pumpkin to arrive, I’ve found him for you.  He’s currently in the Oval Office, sending out angry tweets, and waiting to hear if he’ll be impeached…

I love Halloween because it’s the one day of the year that cosplay is open to everyone, not just to super nerdy 20 or 30 somethings who still live in their parents’ basements…

monologue jokes, writing, The Nite Show, humor, Modern PhilosopherKids in Augusta are thrilled about the new trick of treat rules at The Blaine House.  This year, Governor Mills will actually pass out the candy to trick or treaters, rather than keeping it all for herself like Governor LePage used to do…

Kevin Smith’s Jay and Silent Bob Reboot premiered last night.  Early estimates are that it’s going to take at least a month to get the stench of weed out of all those theaters…

“It’s The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown” airs tomorrow night, followed by the election themed “You’re Not Elected, Charlie Brown”.  In that second, lesser known program, Charlie Brown takes office, even though he didn’t win the popular vote, because he was chosen by the Electoral College.  And he wonders why all the kids hate him…

Jessica Meir of Caribou, Maine made history last weekend as one of two astronauts involved in the first all women space walk.  Proving that some people will go to extraordinary lengths just to avoid the arrival of colder weather in Maine…

monologue jokes, writing, The Nite Show, humor, Modern PhilosopherThe impeachment inquiry continues with more challenges facing President Trump and his associates.  At this point, it might just be cheaper to turn the White House into a prison, rather than paying to relocate its occupants to jails throughout the country…

Maine suffered from massive windstorms last week, which caused many Mainers to have panic attacks because they feared that Governor LePage had returned…

On this day in history in 1787, the Federalist Papers, which called for the ratification of the of the US Constitution, were published. Those who opposed the Constitution, immediately dismissed the Federalist Papers as fake news…

So what did you think?  Did any of the rejects make you laugh?  Did you have a favorite?  Inquiring monologue jokes want to know…

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The Halloween Party

Halloween, short story, flash fiction, humor, dating, Modern PhilosopherHe sat off in the corner, all by himself, on a beat up couch that seemed as forgotten by the homeowners as he wanted to be by the other party guests.

He was dressed in a tuxedo and looked quite dashing, but he was more concerned with peeling the label off his beer bottle, than he was about making an impression on anyone else.

She wandered over and sat down next to him.  “Do you mind if I sit here?”

He looked up from his intricate label work, flashed her a half smile, and shook his head.

“James Bond?” she asked after taking a sip of whatever kept her red Solo cup half empty or half full.  She was leaning towards half empty at the moment, but the night was still young.

“Excuse me?” he asked and looked over at her again.  This time, he took a longer look.  She was very attractive, and he made the executive decision that she was more deserving of his time than the beer bottle.

“Your costume,” she explained her question.  “Are you James Bond, or just completely overdressed for this little shindig?”

She smiled and he chuckled.

Halloween, short story, flash fiction, humor, dating, Modern Philosopher“I’m a groom,” he explained.  “I can’t think of anything scarier than a man on his wedding day.”

“Wow!” was all she could think to say.

“What about you?” he asked hoping to shift the focus onto her because he sensed she wasn’t impressed by his reply. “Did you forget this was a costume party?”

She feigned horror, and then stood up and did a quick spin for him.  She was wearing jeans, sneakers, and a stylish shirt.  She looked great, but not at all Halloweeny.

“This is my costume!” she insisted as she sat down again.  “I’m a time traveler.”

He scratched his head, and quickly looked her up and down to try to find any clue that explained the costume.

“I don’t get it,” he finally confessed.

“I’m from the future,” she told him.  “When I left my present day, it wasn’t Halloween.  Hence my not wearing a costume.  It’s a bit of a thinker…”

She smiled, pleased with her creativity.

“So does Halloween not exist in the future?” he pressed.  “I mean, otherwise, wouldn’t you have been aware that October 31 of any year was Halloween?”

She raised an eyebrow like she was impressed.  “You’re the first person to question that.  Everyone else just nods like they get it and walk away.  Gold star for you.”

“A gold star is a real treat, and not at all a trick,” he responded with another smile.

“To be honest, I’m not really a Halloween person,” she shared and took a sip of her drink.  “My friends insisted on coming, and I agreed after hours of browbeating, but only if I didn’t have to wear a stupid costume.”

Halloween, Maine, humor, Modern PhilosopherHe looked down at his costume.  “Not all costumes are stupid…”

She quickly realized her mistake.  “Oh…no.  I didn’t mean you…”

“You’re right, though,” he agreed.  “I came to this party in hopes of finding a potential date, but it’s hard to do that after you explain that your costume means the mere idea of marriage scares the hell out of you.”

“Then tell them you’re James Bond,” she suggested with a wink.

“I’m Sebastian,” he offered because she was the first woman all night to not run away after he discussed his costume.

“Wow!” she said again.  “Did your parents want you to get bullied?”

They both had a good chuckle at that, and he took a long chug of beer.

“I’m named after my Dad, who’s named after his Dad…”

“So you’re Sebastian, III?” she quickly did the math.  “How much time did you spend stuffed inside of lockers and recovering from wedgies?”

“Not as much as you’d think,” he played along.  “I was remarkably fast, and once the track coach picked up on this, I became a star sprinter.  And no one bullies the jocks.”

She tapped his bottle with her cup.  “Cheers to your ability to outrun your name.”

“Now you’ve got to tell me yours,” he informed her.  “And I have a sneaking suspicion that your concerns about name bullying mean that you have a problem with that very issue.”

She blushed slightly and tapped her nose with her index finger.

Halloween, short story, flash fiction, humor, dating, Modern Philosopher“I’m Nicki, and I was named after Santa Claus,” she admitted with a heavy sigh.  “My parents were obsessed with Christmas, and wanted nothing more than a baby for the big holiday.  They’ve told me, on numerous occasions, that they went at it like jackrabbits every year right after St. Patrick’s Day in hopes of knocking up Mom so she would deliver the ultimate Christmas present.”

His jaw dropped.  “Please tell me you weren’t born on Christmas.”

She shook her head.  “I’m a June baby.  They didn’t get the timing right, and they didn’t get a boy they could name Nicholas, so I was christened Nicole, but dubbed Nicki so I could remind them of their jolly idol as much as possible.”

“At least they didn’t name you after Rudolph, or one of the other reindeer,” he tried his best to make her smile.

“I’d make a hell of a Blitzen, though!” she announced with a giggle.

“You want to get out of here?” he asked impulsively.  “Neither of us seem to be a huge fan of Halloween or this party.”

Halloween, short story, flash fiction, humor, dating, Modern PhilosopherShe nodded and blushed.  “I’d like that.  For the record, I’m in no hurry to get married, either, so I think your costume is hilarious.  And there’s no way I’d ever hang Sebastian, IV on a baby, so if that’s a deal breaker, I’ll just get back in my time machine…”

“I agree with you on that one,” he assured her.  “And Christmas is actually my favorite holiday, so I’m taking this whole name thing as a sign from the Fates.”

“Fa la la la la la la la la…” she sang as she took his hand and they headed for the exit…

Posted in Holidays, Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 15 Comments