Happy Birthday, America! Don’t Eat Too Much Cake…

StatueHappy Birthday, America!  Happy Birthday to you.  Happy Birthday to you.  Happy Birthday, Dear America!  Happy Birthday to you!  And many more…

Happy Independence Day, Modern Philosophers!  I just put out the flag so that the Stars and Stripes are flying proudly outside The House on the Hill.  I’m wearing my Red, White, and Blue tie dyed toga and the crazy Uncle Sam I found on my porch.

So what are you doing today to celebrate the birthday of the greatest nation in the world?  Come on, my non-American readers, you know America is awesome!

I’m having a huge barbecue at The House on the Hill.  Uncle Sam is the Guest of Honor and I am grilling up some red Yankee Doodle Dogs as they are his favorite.  The Ghosts of some of the Founding Fathers are also scheduled to attend.

Uncle SamAfter we eat, play Zombie Horseshoes, and turn the street in front of my house into Maine’s longest Slip-n-Slide, we’re going to retire inside for our annual screening of Independence Day.  My Alien friends LOVE getting a little tipsy, watching the flick, and doing a running commentary on it.  I’ll try to write a post about it later.

We might go to the parade if it’s not too hot, and then tonight, we head up to the roof, which Gary the Gargoyle is happy to share wiht us for the night, to watch the Fireworks Show.  We’ve got a perfect view of the river from the roof and can see the light show without having to deal with the crowds.

Depending on how the day goes, and factoring in the time difference, we might hop on an Alien Cruiser and zip over to Vatican City to catch some of the Pope’s Springsteen Concert and Fireworks Blow Out.  It’s going to be a fun day!

So what about you, Modern Philosophers?  How do you celebrate Independence Day?  How are you going to enjoy this most Patriotic of Holidays?  What did you get America for its birthday?

Have a happy and safe Fourth!!!

About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
This entry was posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

24 Responses to Happy Birthday, America! Don’t Eat Too Much Cake…

  1. marianzidaru says:

    Reblogged this on EARTH CHANGE MZ and commented:
    DACA ESTE 4 IULIE … ATUNCI ZICI AMERICA.

  2. 1wanderingtruthseeker says:

    I would invite the neighbor miscreants, but I would have to check their pockets on the way out. I’d find my salt shakers, extra toliet paper and pill bottles in there. Awwww… I wanted to hear about the screening.

  3. Happy 4th of July to you – although, I beg to differ – Australia is the best nation on earth, but the U.S. can have second place

  4. PigLove says:

    Happy 4th my friend! XOXO – Bacon

  5. Pingback: Happy Birthday America! | The Dreamweaver's Cottage

  6. michaelmulholland says:

    Happy Indepence Day All…a great day for prayer and giving thanks to those before us who have sacrificed their lives for a greater good, for the great and blessed life we all live today and for tomorrow…

  7. filbio says:

    I celebrated by staying put in NYC – no travel for me! Boozy brunch, movie, and then a fun bar at night with friends. Happy 4th!

  8. Happy Belated Fourth of July to you, Austin. I spent my holiday going to the Canadian side of Niagara Falls. I’ve never been there before, and decided there was no time like the present. The daytime was perfect with light traffic, as everyone was elsewhere celebrating. I also got to see the fireworks display from the border. It worked out well, I think.

    • Austin says:

      But you weren’t in America for Independence Day? And you weren’t in Canada for Canada Day? Do you have something against freedom and celebrations???? 🙂

      • I slipped on Canada Day, but did wish them well from my office. Independence day, though, was celebrated in a truer fashion. I was able to travel as a free man without the serious threat of government interference. While in Canada, I had a conversation with a journalist from Berlin, and we discussed life in pre-unified Germany. That was way worse for the average traveler.

      • Austin says:

        I suppose we can let you slide this time, but your file has been flagged… 🙂

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