Mayans Selling New Calendar As Fundraiser For Softball Team

Mayan Temple DarkThe Mayans know they don’t exactly have the best history of producing a reliable calendar, but nevertheless, they have decided to create and sell a new calendar to help raise money for their softball team to compete in this month’s International Softball Championship.

“We know we let the world down with our last calendar,” Kinich Kakmo, the Marketing Director of Mayan Softball International, told this Modern Philosopher.  “The team is hoping that people will get the joke and support them by purchasing our new, totally non-threatening version for 2014.  This one even goes to December 31 because we’re sure the world isn’t ending anytime soon!”

calendarKinich quickly won over this Modern Philosopher with his wit and humor, but once he showed me he fundraiser calendars, I laughed so hard I almost wet my toga.

The 2014 Cat Naps calendar, pictured on the left, is a far cry from the Mayan Calendar we’d heard so much about last year.

“Like I said,” Kinich told me with a chuckle and a nudge in the ribs, “we went in a totally different direction this time.”

Ain’t that the understatement of the Mayan Millennium!  The kitties are so friggin’ adorable, and they find the silliest places to fall asleep!

The Mayan Ruiners (awesome name, am I right???) went undefeated in pool play to win the Central American Softball Championship, thereby punching their ticket to the International Softball Championship.  That tournament is being held this year in Tokyo over the last two weeks of this month.

Softball“We would really like to be able to send our team to Japan to compete for the World Title,” Kinich explains as his eyes light up with Mayan pride.  “It is just a very expensive endeavor, however, and the team is already in debt for the costs of the recent Central American Tournament.”

Hence the fundraiser calendars.

“Some of our players are also very talented amateur photographers,” Kinich continued as he enjoyed the Snapple I gave him.  “As much as sport is an international language that brings people from all over the world together, we realized that kitties were even more a source of international unity.  Thus far, the calendars have been jumping off the shelves, but we still need to sell many, many more to raise the money we need.”

So what do you say, Modern Philosophers?  Are you up for buying an adorable calendar while also supporting a good cause?  Can you spare a few extra dollars to help so many dreams come true?

Mayan CalendarIf you’re interested, you can purchase the calendars online at or by calling 1-800-RUINERS.

Does Kinich believe that they can sell enough calendars in time to send the team to the Championships in Tokyo?

“I have a really good feeling about this,” he admitted.  “But if we don’t, then it’s not the end of the world…”



About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
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17 Responses to Mayans Selling New Calendar As Fundraiser For Softball Team

  1. “The Mayan Ruiners”


  2. ksbeth says:

    clever choice for the marketing director’s name )

  3. nicoleep says:

    They should probably also consider selling real kitties, such as the one on the cover of their calendar, because I want him.

  4. Pingback: The Earths End Postponed Again

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