Mainers Vote To Make Magic State’s Official Second Language

MagicOtherworldly Beings in Maine turned out in record numbers today on what pundits had thought would be a quiet Election Day.

However, Proposition 13, the bill to make Magic Maine’s official Second Language, brought out the Witches, Vampires, Aliens, Gargoyles, Flying Monkeys, Werewolves, Ghosts et al in droves.

As a result, it is believed that Prop 13 will pass with flying colors.

This Modern Philosopher, who supported the bill, has always said that Maine is a Magical place.  Now, that will be a legal fact.

Proposition 13 was backed heavily by The All Hallow’s Society, Maine’s Secret Organization that is responsible for planning the Halloween Season.  The Otherworldly Beings who live in this state are devout followers of the AHS, so there was little doubt that Magic would get the necessary votes needed to make it official.

hoods“People don’t seem to understand the influence that The All Hallow’s Society has on life in Maine,” my good friend and Coven leader Waltzing Matilda shared with me as we watched the election coverage at Three Toads & A Wicked Lady.  “The quality of life in Maine has increased substantially over the past decade, and that can be directly linked to the greater acceptance of Otherworldly Beings.  This acceptance was facilitated by The All Hallow’s Society.  We are now citizens with the right to vote and hold public office.  Magic is a very important part of that, and because of Magic, everyone in Maine has a better life.”

Has Maine become the most open-minded and accepting state in the Union?  It would be hard to dismiss that fact after today’s election results.  One Otherworldly Being who is very happy with today’s voter turnout and Maine’s open-mindedness is Mayor McCheese.

cheese“Austin, the mainstream media is going to report that Prop 13 was passed because of the huge turnout by Otherworldly Beings, but as you witnessed, there was also a great turnout by human voters,” McCheese explained as he sipped a celebratory Pumpkin Cauldron Ale on the stool next to mine.  “Exit polling reveals that humans were 85% in favor of the bill.”

The large O.B. turnout bodes very well for McCheese’s chances of being elected Governor on Election Day next year.  When I asked him to comment on that, he declined with a gracious smile.  “Let’s keep the focus on tonight’s victory.”

So what does it mean for Mainers to have Magic as an official Second Language?  Magic will now be taught in all of Maine’s schools, libraries will be required to carry books written in Magic, and Harry Potter will be the state’s new Secretary of Language Arts.

believe magicOkay, that third one was just a joke, but in Maine, one never knows.

If you believe in Magic, tonight’s victory is a huge one for you, even if you don’t live in Maine.  Perhaps the passing of Proposition 13 will lead to a nationwide “Open Sesame” of sorts and open doors all over the country to Magic being a regular part of every day American life.

We can only hope.  For now, Maine remains the most Magical place on Earth.  Happy Election Day!

About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
This entry was posted in Humor, Philosophy and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

14 Responses to Mainers Vote To Make Magic State’s Official Second Language

  1. kalabalu says:

    Love is magic 😉 it changes someone from toad to a prince 🙂

  2. We could use a little magic these days…

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