My body’s immune system is under attack, but I am doing my best to fight it off. I have climbed inside my portable bubble, and am typing this post from its sterile environment as my interns roll me around the house.
Needless to say, my brain is a foggy, confused mess. I’m worried that if I keep sneezing and blowing my nose so much, I’m going to dislocate my brain.
So, I think it’s time to clear the fog, get the Deep Thoughts flowing, and jump start my brain. Anyone else need some brainside assistance? I’ve got the giant Deep Thoughts battery right here, so let me zap you while I’m at it…
What’s the deal with Cold & Flu Season? How have scientists not yet found a cure for the common cold? If it has the word “common” in it’s name, shouldn’t that mean it’s not one of the more complex diseases out there?
Why does the flu keep coming back year after year? Doesn’t the whole world get flu shots? Speaking of which, if I got my flu shot on Wednesday, why am I sick now? Did anyone check the vial and make sure I wasn’t simply injected with the flu?
Why can’t science wipe out these maladies? They’ve pretty much rid the world of smallpox and polio, so why not the cold and the flu? It’s a conspiracy, isn’t it? Science has the cure, but they’re not allowed to share it, right? Flu shots are meant to make us sick and not help us build up an immunity, correct?
I knew it! Big Pharma is behind all this, yes? Is this why the pharmacist pointed me in the direction of the most expensive remedy on the shelf last night? Is that why she didn’t just tell me to get the 99 cent bag of cough drops? How much power does Big Pharma have? Would they rather infect us all and slowly bleed us dry as we buy their “remedies”?
What needs to be done to finally wipe out the cold and flu? When can we finally take away the season we give them? How can we banish those maladies forever? Where’s Jonas Salk when you really need him?
Sorry for rambling on like a madman, Modern Philosophers. I think I have a fever. This is going to be a long, icky day. Send care packages to The House on the Hill please…