Father Time Alleges Age Discrimination; Resolves to Fight Forced Retirement

Here’s one from the Archives. Help Father Time in his fight against age discrimination…before it’s too late!

The Return of the Modern Philosopher

father-time“Baby New Year can cry all he wants, but he’s not getting my job!” declared an irate Father Time as he stood on the steps outside the courthouse in downtown Bangor.  “I will retire under my own terms, and I assure you that New Year’s Eve will not be my last day on the job!”

The gathered crowd roared in support of the old man with the long beard as he raised his withered arms above his head in triumph.

I was on hand for the big announcement, Modern Philosophers, and had goosebumps from all the excitement.

Maybe New Year’s Eve in Maine won’t be so boring after all!

As you well know, it is customary for Baby New Year to take over the job at the stroke of midnight on New Year’s Day.  However, there isn’t anything in writing that says this transition has to take place, and that’s…

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About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
This entry was posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

9 Responses to Father Time Alleges Age Discrimination; Resolves to Fight Forced Retirement

  1. List of X says:

    Seems to me that Father Time at barely 1 year old today is also subject to child labor laws.

  2. averagebob says:

    Look at the guy, no way he could handle the rigors of 2014. He should apply to be Father Christmas (only one night of work!

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