I Advise You To Use The Force!

BlutoDear Modern Philosopher,

I’m in a bit of a jam and I could really use some sage advice and guidance.  I’m just a teenage farmer from…well, let’s just say a place far, far away.

Suddenly, I’m in the middle of an intergalac…well, a very large scale military operation.  I’ve done plenty of flying back on my home plan…plantation…but nothing near the scale and scope of the mission I’m on right now.  I feel like the weight of the entire galaxy is resting on my shoulders, and I have literally one shot to get this right.

What if I mess up?  What if I miss?

I never met my Dad, so I never really had anyone to turn to in times like this.  I recently met someone who became a father figure to me, but then I just witnessed his murder at the hands of a total monster.  I get so angry just thinking about that, and I want to use that rage to rip the head off his killer.

When the hatred consumes me, I can’t think straight.  So I’m not trusting myself right now and I need to focus so I can accomplish my mission.  Everyone’s counting on me, especially this really attractive brunette back at the base who I can’t stop thinking about, and I’d love to celebrate with her if I succeed, you know what I mean?

Help me, Modern Philosopher.  You’re my only hope…

Luke S.

Ben & LukeDear Luke,

It sounds like you need to take a deep breath, clear your thoughts of all distractions, and visualize the task at hand.

I advise you to use The Force, Luke.

You can do this make.  Trust your instincts.  Remember your training.

They picked you for this mission for a reason, dude.

I’m sorry to hear about the loss of your friend.  It sounds like he meant a lot to you.  My father died when I was young, so I understand the void that leaves in a young man’s life.

Follow your instincts.  They already got you from a farm to a high priority military mission, so if you continue to trust them, all will be well.

As for celebrating with that brunette…I hear blondes are a lot more fun.  Trust me on this one.  You’ll thank me later.  Seriously.

May the Force be with you!


About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
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9 Responses to I Advise You To Use The Force!

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