We now bring you an important Holiday Safety Message, Modern Philosophers…
As Christmas draws nearer, more Americans are opening their homes to that Holiday staple, The Elf on the Shelf.
He does look so sweet and innocent, doesn’t he, Modern Philosophers?
Those rosy cheeks, the big eyes, and the awesome wardrobe just make you want to give him a big hug, don’t they?
And the kiddos just love him. My Facebook news feed is flooded with photos of the adorable little guy getting into all sorts of mischief around the house.
How does me manage to be so naughty, yet give off a very strong “Nice” vibe? What is his secret, Modern Philosophers?
The Elf on the Shelf has become a key part of Christmas, hasn’t he?
He has worked his way into our lives, our homes, and dare I even say it…our hearts.
It’s like we’ve known him our whole lives, right?
How do we know that he isn’t just an NSA operative???
He’d be the perfect plant, would he not? No one suspects the little guy. Folks leave him alone in the house all day. They voluntarily put him in places that his little Elf limbs might have difficulty reaching.
Then they take photos of him, and talk about how wonderful it is to have him in their lives for the Holiday Season.
All the while, this smiling stranger is watching everything and missing absolutely nothing…
Has anyone ever stopped to think how insane it is to allow an Elf so much access? How much do you actually know about this guy? Sure, he’s a sharp dresser with a charming smile, but so is every con man and undercover operative out there.
Did you do any sort of background check on your Elf on the Shelf? Did you ask for references and then actually take the time to call them? Did you have him fingerprinted, and then ask your pal who’s a cop to run the prints?
Did you ask your Elf on the Shelf to submit a urine sample? Did you set up spy cams to record what he does when you’re not home?
Would you allow any other stranger to spend significant time in your home, often unattended, without doing a background check? Didn’t you put more thought into what to get at the drive thru for lunch, than you did into deciding if it was safe to get an Elf on the Shelf?
The NSA has set a precedent for not playing by the rules. Now that we know they read our emails and texts, tap our phones, and vote on our behalf for American Idol, shouldn’t we suspect that they have come up with new ways to watch our every move?
Do your research, too, Modern Philosophers. If you don’t, you might end up on lists even worse than the Naughty one…