The New Year, From A Gargoyle’s Perspective

BangorWhen I stepped out onto the roof of The House on the Hill, Modern Philosophers, Gary the Gargoyle was waiting for me.

One could never sneak up on a Gargoyle due to their keen sense of hearing, so Gary had been well aware that I was on my way up to visit him.

“Happy New Year, my friend!” I shouted and waved once I had both feet solidly on the roof.  Most of the ice and snow was gone, but I was always careful when up on the roof.

“Happy New Year, Austin,” he replied with a smile.

“I suppose you had an excellent view of the fireworks last night,” I said as I made my way towards Gary’s perch at the front edge of the roof.

“Yes, I flew downtown to watch the ball drop,” Gary informed me.  “There was so many people and that tiny ball was extremely difficult to pick up in the crowd.

Most people aren’t aware of the fact that Bangor has its very own New Year’s Eve Ball Drop.  While attendance was slightly less than the better known event in Times Square, it still drew quite a crowd.

Bangor ball dropA beach ball wrapped in Christmas lights is tossed off the roof of a downtown building every New Year’s Eve.  That’s right, Modern Philosophers, Mainers know how to party!

“I have to tell you that I’m touched, and if it were possible for my stony eyes to produce tears, this would be the moment for them,” Gary confessed when I made it to where he waited for me.

I was confused.  “Who touched you?” I joked to try to hide how lost I was.

“Of all the characters that populate your blog, you’ve chosen this stoic Gargoyle to be the first one you feature in a post in the new year.  It really is quite an honor.”

I hadn’t given that any thought, but since Gary was touched by it, I smiled.  People seem to think that a lot of planning goes into this blog, but I basically just report on what I see going on around me.  I felt like going up on the roof to get some fresh air, and as a result, it was now the Year of the Gargoyle on this blog.

“You’re a good friend, and your advice is always so wise, so I thought I would start off my year right by coming up to see you,” I fudged to go along with the moment.

“I still don’t understand why humans make such a big deal about the new year,” Gary shared as he stretched his mighty wings.  “They talk about a fresh start, a clean slate, and make resolutions, but absolutely nothing is different.  All that happened was one day ended and a new one began.”

jailI shook my head in disagreement as I sat down next to his perch.  “Humans can conjure up false hope better than any Witch at a cauldron.  New Year’s Day is the ultimate Get Out Of Jail Free card.  We have convinced ourselves that when the clock strikes midnight, one year ends, taking all our strife, stress, and sins along with it, while a new one full of hope, happiness, and endless possibilities begins.”

Gary gave me that stone faced look, typical of a confused Gargoyle.  “That is one of the stupidest things I’ve ever heard.”

I didn’t disagree with him.  “We screw up so badly and so often, and we need all the false hope we can get.”

“But nothing’s different,” Gary pressed his point.  “Everything is exactly the same as it was last night, aside from some confetti and passed out drunks in the streets.”

Happy-New-Year-16I knew there was no way to explain to a Gargoyle what New Year’s Day meant to humans.  So I decided to take a different tact.  “How about we go for a flight, and I’ll point out the differences to you?”

I didn’t feel great about misleading Gary, but I really felt like flying.  Plus, it was a new year, and one little white lie on an otherwise clean slate wouldn’t be a big deal…

About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
This entry was posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to The New Year, From A Gargoyle’s Perspective

  1. lululove88 says:

    🎉🎊💛HAPPY NEW YEAR!!🎉🎊💛

  2. Louise says:

    what a wonderful way to explain New Years Day…it is true,(unfortunately, the false hope bit) What another wonderful way to begin 2015 with Flight of the Gargoyle… a very happy start to your new year.

  3. rowanaliya says:

    Happy New Year Austin, to you and all those who visit the House on the Hill!

  4. bernquist says:

    Great story and happy New Year!

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