What Was Life Like Before Snow Was Invented?

House on the HillI sit here at The House on the Hill, Modern Philosophers, watching another snowstorm dump its load on Maine, and I wonder what life was like before snow was invented.

When I was a kid, my Dad would entertain me for hours with stories about the world before snow.  Of course, he was too young to have lived in such a time, but his great grandfather had been there.

In fact, my great great grandfather was living in England when snow was invented.  Since the scientist who created it, Dr. Johnathan Wiloughby Snow, had been British, England was the first country to ever be covered in the white stuff.

According to my Dad, who I’m sure was fudging the details a little to make the tales more amusing for me, British kids were so scared of snow that they had refused to come out of their houses to play in it.

Could you imagine any child who didn’t love snow?   Of course, it makes perfect sense that the kiddos wouldn’t want to run out and jump into the strange white stuff that was falling from the sky.  They probably thought the world was ending.

snowmanAccording to my Dad’s accounts, it was only after Dr. Snow and his fellow scientists wandered out into the snow and built the first Snowman, that children were willing to bundle up and give snow a chance.

When I was a child, Dr. Snow was my hero.  His invention led to the White Christmases, snow days, and tackle snow football.

I can’t begin to fathom what Winters must have been like without snow.  The world just got dark and cold for three months?  Sounds very apocalyptic to be honest.

As an adult, I’m no longer singing Dr. Snow’s praises.  Snow sucks.  It’s a horror to have to drive in it, it’s literally a pain to remove it from my property, it causes power outages, and it causes numerous delays.

Why couldn’t Dr. Snow have kept his annoying invention to himself?  From the research I’ve done, it sounds like he wasn’t even trying to create a new form of accumulating weather.  Basically, that means snow was a “happy accident” of Science.

Woo hoo!

And what’s the deal with Dr. Snow naming his invention after himself?  What a narcissist!

Dr SnowI’d like to Time Travel back to England in the early nineteenth century and change the course of history.  Would I need to kill Dr. Snow to alter the timeline and give us a world devoid of his horrible creation?  Probably not, but I am willing to consider doing so if that’s the only option.

Perhaps I could befriend Dr. Snow, earn his trust, and point him in the proper direction so that he invents what he actually intended on that fateful day.

Of course, I’d have to face the painful truth that even if I kept Dr. Snow from stumbling upon the formula for snow, some other scientist would eventually come up with it.  Would I spend the rest of my life traveling through time to stop the invention of snow, or whatever it would be called?

Why not?  I am a big fan of Time Travel and a huge opponent of the accumulating white stuff that constantly falls from the sky in Maine during the Winter.

While I’m traveling back in time to complete my missions, I’ll get to finally discover the answer to the question posed in the title of this post.

I think this is an excellent plan, Modern Philosophers.  I’m going to see if I can get a hold of Doc Brown and convince him to lend me the DeLorean for a little while.

snow stormMy next blog post should be from the past and finally answer that burning question of what life was like before snow was invented!

I’m going to enjoy watching this snowstorm after all, because it might very well be the last time I ever witness such an event…

About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
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11 Responses to What Was Life Like Before Snow Was Invented?

  1. E.L. Wicker says:

    Looks like another year here without the white stuff. That’s two years without snow now which saddens me greatly. I understand the difficulty of having to try to run your life around such an interference. Everyone always tells me I love snow because I never bothered getting my drivers license (I will, eventually) and a snow day here involves nipping to the shop that is no more than a two minute walk from my house. Because we don’t get it so much here, and because it doesn’t disrupt me when it graces us with its appearance, snow brings me a lot of joy. A pristine white world that looks like all has been forgiven, my dogs excitement because if there is one person that loves snow more than me, it’s Monty – my Labrador and the total contentment I get when watching it fall from my window with a hot chocolate in my hands as it covers up the tracks we just left in it. I am on snows side – always 🙂

  2. wccunningham says:

    I grew up in the southwest, only seeing snow a few times in my life. Now in NY, I honestly see the beauty in it although I could live without sub zero temps and wind. What is the point of wind anyway unless you have a wind turbine or are a sailor?

  3. AC says:

    Did Dr. Snow own a shovel factory?

  4. Pamela Edwards says:

    No snow here . But i do feel for my friends in the North . ☺

  5. markbialczak says:

    Please, Austin, do it! Change history. No more snow.

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