My Top 5 Favorite Things About Being Single

5 fireI had a revelation while in the bathroom this morning, Modern Philosophers.

Don’t worry, it’s nothing gross.  I noticed that the toilet paper roll was almost finished.  I thought to myself “I’m single, I live alone, I can get crazy and bust out a brand new roll now rather than waiting for the current one to run out… and no one can give me grief for it!”

After this minor triumph, I realized that my rebellious changing of the roll might very well end up being the highlight of my day.

Such is the life of a single guy.

So I gave myself a challenge: Instead of writing another post poking fun at my terrible dating skills, write one about what’s so great about being single.

Believe it or not, Modern Philosophers, I managed to do it.

5 Fight1. No more fighting!  I have to admit, Modern Philosophers, that I definitely had a thing for getting in the last word and trying to win every argument back in my non-single days.

I think writers are prone to such behavior given the power we have over words.  Of course, I was a jerk at times and piled on just for the sake of it.  That was a long time ago, though, and I know I’m not that same immature guy.

J and I got into countless fights over the years, but that’s bound to happen when you are together for so long and know each other so well.  You are well aware of what buttons to push and what insecurities to access to win that war of words.

I so don’t miss the long, angry silences that followed a fight.  I might get lonely at times, but I’ll take lonely over being purposely ignored by the woman I love any day.

keep writing2. More time to write!  It’s not like I didn’t write when I was in a relationship, but I didn’t write enough.  One of my big problems with married life was that I was forever working while J went to school and worked.  I never got to just chase my writing dream.

When you’re in a relationship, there is so much more to do, so writing can be one of those things pushed aside to make way for “couples activities” if writing isn’t the main source of one’s income.

There’s no way I’d have time to blog everyday if I were in a relationship, so I guess you guys are thrilled that I’m single… (joking…mostly…you know who you are…)

5 remote3. Absolute control over the remote!  Relationships are all about compromise, Modern Philosophers, and I have suffered through my share of odd programs and bizarre movies for the sake of a loved one.

Now, I don’t have to defer to a higher power.  I watch and record whatever the heck I want.  If the Yankees are on, the TV is tuned to the game, even if I’m writing or doing something in another room.  The Yankees are my ideal background noise.

Controlling the remote also means I can watch TV whenever I decide it’s TV time.  Who wouldn’t love that?

5 To Do4. A much more lenient chore schedule!  It’s not like I live in filth or there’s never any food in The House on the Hill, but let’s just say I might not mop, vacuum, or bust out the feather duster as often as some former housemates demanded.

This is a bachelor pad, and the To Do List is made up mostly of things like “Watch the game”, “Relax”, “Have some ice cream”, and “Write more!”.

Stuff gets done, but at a much more leisurely (lazy) pace.

5 presents5. No more gift giving anguish!  Bet this one took your by surprise.  Good.  I’d hate to be predictable.

I’m a Hopeless Romantic, and I set high standards for gift giving for the one I love.  As much as I enjoy the look on her face when she opens her presents on Christmas morning, her Birthday, or our Anniversary, I’m a nervous wreck during the “trying to figure out how to spoil her even more this year” part of the process.

I know this shouldn’t cause stress, but it did for me.  I always worried that if I wasn’t totally creative, perceptive, and generous in my gift giving, it would seem like I didn’t love her as much as I did the previous year.

Honorable Mention:  More chicken wings and ice cream in my diet, Less shopping and antiquing, Showerless Sundays, Flirting is no longer a capital crime, Better self reliance, No more fighting for the covers in the middle of the night.

What did you think of My Top 5, Modern Philosophers?  What are some aspects of single life that would make your list?

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About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
This entry was posted in Dating, Humor, Love, Philosophy and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

47 Responses to My Top 5 Favorite Things About Being Single

  1. jan says:

    I’m not single but when my husband’s out of town, it’s eating popcorn for dinner that makes my happy to be alone (he would frown on such things!)

  2. grannyK says:

    I can have PB&J for dinner or breakfast even if I want! No cooking unless I want to! That is a bonus.

  3. Patman says:

    Plus, you can be your own bachelor.

  4. I am definitely missing many aspects of my ‘singledom’ … you’re on point looking at the positives!

  5. For me there are many, many great things about being single. I’ve been single a long time – I was even single when I was in relationships . . .. that said. I still miss being a couple. I still want it 🙂

  6. claidig says:

    #6 Bed space. I like my bed, and its lovely, lovely space. Not single, but there is a reason (or few) I no longer live with the bed hogger.

  7. I know this was written by a male, but the same can be said for a single woman. I have been single for hmmmm…..14 years now? And it suits me fine. Im no man hater by any means, but having control over all of your time, all of your paychecks, write until 3am with music on if you so desire, only washing my own underwear, and travel to anywhere or anytime that I please has really suited me well. No harm no foul if you are in a committed relationship, but I have learned that being in a committed relationship with me is simply FANTASTIC!! Thanks so much for the post. Brilliant!

    • Austin says:

      I’m glad you enjoyed it!

      My dating posts are always written for both sexes. It’s just easier to write from a male perspective to keep the pronouns in order. 🙂

      Feel free to share this post!

  8. Love it! Trying to get used to being single. Hope I can be this positive at some point. 🙂

  9. Pamela Edwards says:

    Great blog Austin ! You are your own man , captain of your ship , master of your destiny. You rule the roost . No hen to peck at you lol ! 🐔

  10. Reblogged this on By the Mighty Mumford and commented:
    A CHARMING GUY LIKE YOU…STILL SINGLE????

  11. I NEED MY WIFE…HOW COULD I FIND THINGS WHERE SHE (OR I ) HID THEM? 🙂

  12. suzanne says:

    One of the ways I have to actively keep myself in check is with my words. I realized some time ago that, like you said, I can use words to hurt people, to get the last word in an argument, and to be the best word-wielder. But it’s rarely worth it. Also I’m taking advantage of my singleness by reading as much as possible. I should be writing more, too. One of my married mom friends has said, “Read now! You won’t have time later.”

  13. Hmm.. I started to post comments such as “I can find things where I left them” and “I only have to do my own laundry” and “I can watch whichever movie fits my mood,” but then I realized that my life is ruled by a five year-old, thus none of the aforementioned applies.

  14. It’s been so long since I was single I have forgot that there was a life back then… 🙂 But I do like your list – it is very comprehensive, actually, and it’s good to know singleness has much to recommend it! Especially the remote control thing. And time to write. 🙂 Maybe I would add, not having to cook unless I feel like it. And a smaller ironing pile.

  15. donedreaming says:

    Sleeping in quiet darkness – ex needed the TV on to sleep, and using the WHOLE bed – no dark side, just oodles of lovely calm whiteness. Eat, or not, any time of day or night (chocolate for breakfast is yummy). No sulking silences to navigate (unless it’s the dog). To have a dog – ex was allergic to dogs (and seemingly to everything else good in life, including me!). To garden from dawn til dusk – and beyond. To have time to fall in love with yourself – take yourself on dates you always wanted to go on, buy flowers for yourself, holiday anywhere without thinking of anyone else. The single life has endless possibilities ..

  16. I’m not single, but for me, when my husband is on night shift I get to watch whatever the hell I want on Netflix (which is usually something sci-fi) AND keep the lamp on in the theatre room so I can crochet at the same time lol.

  17. I really liked this post and feel happy that you can acknowledge the positive. I have not been single for over a quarter century, but in the interests of adding to your list… you don’t have to listen to the other person snore or tell you how you snore (for YEARS I truly believed I did not. yeah, right, with my sinuses?). And being able to flirt is a BIG thing. I miss it. OK, sometimes I still do it, but it’s much more exciting when there is the vague possibility that it will lead somewhere. All that said, I adore my husband but shall try not to brag about my marital bliss.

  18. Capt Jill says:

    Can take off and travel any time and go anywhere I want!

  19. Haha. Thanks for a couple new ones… you know where your remote is?? Good job!!

    The gift giving was on point. How DO you beat last years trip to Paris anyways?

    https://skinnyandsingle.wordpress.com

  20. stuckinscared says:

    I’m married, and have no issues with hubs controlling the remote… so long as he puts my programs on 😉

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