As time travel was on my mind, I thought I’d address an issue that very well could come up on a first date. Since technology is so advanced, and people are meeting online, you never really know who is going to sit down across from you on a blind date.
I thought that we should review what to do in the event that your date reveals that she is a time traveler.
As always, since I am a man who dates women, the date in the post will be referred to as a female. However, these tips apply to members of both sexes.
Now she’s dropped this major bomb, so there’s no way you can just take her word for it. We’ve all seen enough movies to know that any time traveler worth her salt will take steps to be able to prove her claim.
You’re not a jerk if you put her on the spot. It’s only the first date, so it’s not like you’d be destroying a trust you’ve built up over a long relationship. Tell her, in no uncertain terms, to either show you some proof, or hit the road back to whatever year she calls home.
Ask to see her time machine. If you accept her supporting documentation, and buy that she is a time traveler, you’ve got to ask to see the time machine. Don’t let her tell you she hid it someplace far away and then hitched a ride to your date.
This isn’t 1955. She’s not going to leave a piece of technology that advanced and valuable parked behind a sign on the highway. It’s somewhere nearby. Make her show it to you.
No excuses. This is a first date, and you need to show her that you are confident, cocky, and won’t back down.
If you let her talk you out of this, then you are giving her the position of power in this relationship, and you are in big trouble.
Man up and get her to take you back to the future. Or to the past. Just time travel.
Find out if she was sent to kill you. You should always be on guard against a blind date trying to kill you. I established that as rule number one in my very first dating tips post, Modern Philosophers.
As we all know, time travelers don’t always come in peace. Sometimes, they are on a mission to kill you. So, before you get into that time machine with her, you might want to find out if she has homicidal intent.
They have also taught us that some time travelers are not human.
You must figure out if she is human, cyborg, Alien, or something else entirely. I’m not sure how you are going to do it, but your life could depend on it, so be creative.
Just remember, humans bleed red. I’m not suggesting anything. Just stating a fact.
Calculate the age difference. If she is human and from the future, ask her when she was born and then calculate how much older than her you actually are.
Can you live with that age difference? Not everyone is into that kind of thing.
Some couples can make that work, but for others, it is a real burden.
Really give this one some thought because you might not want to give your heart to someone who is going to take it hundreds of years into the future.
Find out if she is there to recruit you to save the world. Not everyone is built to handle the hero’s journey. If that’s not your cup of tea, you need to know right away if she tricked you into going on a date in order to convince you to be the savior of the world.
Sure, it will suck if that ends up being the case, but wouldn’t you rather know up front before you fall for her only to realize she’s really not that into you?
Remember, she wasn’t truthful with you from the start, so she is in the wrong here.
If you’re not feeling it, just tell her time traveling isn’t your bag. Even if you are lying through you teeth since we all know everyone loves time travel!
Find out if she knows Doc Brown. Doc is my idol, mentor, and this blog’s biggest financial supporter. Shoot me an email if she claims to know Doc, and I’ll ask him about her. She might think she’s the only time traveler around, but we all know better.
I hope these dating tips were helpful. Remember, while time travel is totally awesome, the fact that your date is a time traveler doesn’t necessarily mean that she’s “the one”.
Be smart out there in the dating world, Modern Philosophers!