Not One For The Time Capsule

Bangor“It was that bad of a day?” Gary asked from his perch at the front of The House on the Hill’s roof.

My Gargoyle was extremely perceptive, but I was curious to know what gave away my mood, considering all I’d done so far was climb out of the attic window.

“How can you tell?” I queried as I slowly made my way across the roof.

“You’re still in your work clothes,” he explained.  “If you need the freedom of the roof before you even change into shorts and a tee shirt, it means that you had a horrible day.”

Yes, I did rush up to the roof upon returning home after work, but I did make a pit stop in the kitchen to grab a Snapple from the fridge.  I popped the top and took a long sip as I sat down next to Gary’s perch.

“It was definitely Monday: The Deluxe Edition,” I answered when I finally came up for air.  The iced tea just tasted so darn good.

Gargoille“You left here in such a good mood,” Gary pointed out as he raised his wings to shield me from the powerful Summer sun.  “What happened to being positive?”

“I’m positive that today sucked,” I quipped.  “Is that better?”

Gary chuckled and gave me a moment to wallow in my self pity.  My faithful Gargoyle knew me well enough to understand when I just needed to vent.

“I thought work was going to be easy sneezy today,” I began to explain.

“Please don’t tell me you actually use the term ‘easy sneezy’ around people,” Gary interrupted and then gave me a wink.

He was good at distracting me and making my laugh.

“Of course not,” I told him with a grin.  “That’s a turn of phrase I reserve only for your sensitive, stone ears.”

“Good to know,” Gary responded as he flapped his wings suddenly to warn off the pack of Flying Monkeys that had been circling overhead.

“If you want to go play with the monkeys, I’m cool just sitting here and drinking my Snapple,” I lied.

This glass is totally full...of itself. Avoid stuck up glassware whenever possible!

This glass is totally full…of itself. Avoid stuck up glassware whenever possible!

“Those pests can come back after we’ve discussed your day,” Gary informed me with an eye roll, which I assume was in response to my obvious lie.  “So what made today so stressful?  I thought your coworker was returning from vacation.”

“That was the plan, but she was out sick.”

“Now it’s all becoming clear,” Gary said with a chuckle.  “I’m sorry your Monday was more Mondayish than you expected.”

“It definitely wasn’t one for the time capsule, my friend,” I shared that witty comment before taking a giant gulp of my Snapple.

“Have you ever actually put something in a time capsule?” Gary asked as he hopped down off his perch to pace across the roof.

It was kind of cute the way he waddled when he was in Deep Thought.

“Can’t say that I have, and not sure what I’d put in one,” I answered.  “Definitely not my writing.  Every once in a while, I’ll glance at a script I wrote when I was in my twenties. Not only can I not believe how horrible the writing it, but I’m also dumbfounded that I once thought it was so good that I could send it out to agents and production companies.  What was I thinking?”

time capsule“Then that’s the perfect thing to put in a time capsule,” Gary pointed out as he finally stopped pacing and leaned against his perch.

“I don’t follow,” I admitted with a confused look on my face.

“When you open a time capsule, you want to look at what’s inside and be impressed at how things have changed.  You want to see progress and know that life has gotten better.”

“Then I should definitely put today in a time capsule,” I suggested with a smile.

“Now you’re getting it.”  Gary winked.  “Do you know what I do when I’m having a particularly gruesome day?”

sunset“You go flying?” I answered quickly and excitedly.

“That’s right,” he answered and turned his back to me.  “Hop on and we’ll head high into the sky where the stress can’t get us.”

And that, Modern Philosophers, is why everyone should have a Gargoyle!

About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
This entry was posted in Humor, Philosophy, Writing and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Not One For The Time Capsule

  1. Joseph Nebus says:

    I’m surprised you don’t just put alarm clocks in the time capsule.

    (That said there are some songs that function like that for me. Hearing a song that was prominent at one moment can transport me instantly back to that time, and to consider how things have changed since then.)

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