I’ve done decades of research, collecting all kinds of receipts so that I can be reimbursed by the government for my work, and the results are always the same…
Christmas makes me fat!
Not Santa Claus fat.
At least not yet, but I have definitely come close to being mistaken for the big guy when I was haunted by the Ghosts of Christmas Desserts Past.
The winter weight gain is inevitable, Modern Philosophers. In fact, it’s something mankind has done for ages to survive the long, harsh winters.
We pack on the pounds to keep us warm, and we become less active because the world outside is scary and cold.
Then we live off that fat until the snow disappears, the temperature rises, and it’s safe to go back outside again.
Of course, over time, we’ve stopped losing that winter fact because we’re no longer running from dinosaurs or working eighteen hour days in the fields to bring in the crops.
We’re a spoiled, lazy people, and every winter, we pack more winter pounds on top of all the pounds still there from the previous winters.
Calories don’t care about your religion. They just want to love you.
This is the Season of Giving, isn’t it?
So give me some desserts!!!
One doesn’t need to be a writer and master of words to know that this means that desserts will reverse the effects of a stressed life.
We need to devour Christmas desserts for our mental health and well being.
Look at Santa Claus. The guy is literally a Saint, and all he wants as payment for his Christmas work is to have Christmas desserts left out for him.
If it’s good enough for St. Nick, it’s good enough for this Modern Philosopher.
Unlike Calories of Christmas Past, the Christmas Calories of 2015 aren’t just going to overpopulate my stomach, though.
This year, I’m six months deep into my running program. I’ve got over 100 runs under my toga already, Modern Philosophers, and I’m still hitting the road five days a week.
It’s the first week of December, and I’m going strong. I’ve been out for several runs when the temperature was in the teens, and my new cold weather gear kept me toasty.
I ran four miles this morning, and it was so nice out that I didn’t need my mask or hood. A milder winter would definitely help me stay active.
Of course, my desire to inhale Christmas desserts like they are the key to eternal life is a very strong motivation for me to continue with my running program.
This is the year that I don’t want to pack on weight over the winter. Hell, I am going to be so bold as to say that I plan to lose weight.
All without having to give up my precious Christmas desserts.
So in conclusion, Modern Philosophers, it is virtually impossible to outrun Christmas desserts. What you can do, however, is make them your running partner and allow them to motivate you to sweat off all the calories and then some.
Why deprive yourself of Christmas Joy when the Holiday only rolls around once a year?
Embrace your inner Santa (if you can get your arms around him) and then let your Inner Runner Boy/Girl take care of the rest.
Happy Holidays! Now go have some dessert!!!