This Blows!

This Blows! | The Return of the Modern PhilosopherIs that

The sound

Of trumpets

I hear

Approaching

In the distance?

Has the

Invading Army

Finally

Reached

Our shores?

Is the end

Of civilization

A mere

Afternoon’s

March

Away?

What if

Those horns,

That cacophony

Of sound

That has

My ears

Ringing,

Is our

Official notice

That the end

Is not only

Near,

But also

Incredibly

Painful?

Worse yet,

What if

This torturous

Finale

Were to be

Dragged

Out

Until

November?

This Blows! | The Return of the Modern PhilosopherIs it

Possible

That the horns

I hear

Are not

Really

Horns

At all?

Could

That sound

Be a

Herd

Of

Marauding

Elephants

Tearing its

Way across

New England?

After all,

New Hampshire

Isn’t

Very far

From Maine!

Rampaging

Elephants,

Desperate

For attention

And trying

To exert

Their dominance

On the land

Around them,

Would be

Much worse

Than a

Well armed

Batallion

Of

Infantry!

This Blows! | The Return of the Modern PhilosopherIf the Elephants

Were chasing

A pack of

Old, ornery

Donkeys,

Could the leader

Of the

Elephants

Still be

Considered

A Jackass?

It’s

His horn

That sounds

The loudest,

Quite

Possibly

Because

He is

Blowing it

Himself.

This Blows! | The Return of the Modern PhilosopherOh wait,

That sound

Isn’t coming

From an

Attacking army,

A herd of

Elephants,

Or a couple

Of

Braying

Donkeys.

It’s just

My nose.

I’ve been

Blowing it

All day,

And I think

The cold medicine

Has made me

Delirious.

Carry on.

Just

Ignore me.

This blows!

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About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
This entry was posted in Humor, Philosophy, Poetry, Politics and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

12 Responses to This Blows!

  1. The Hook says:

    I get it, buddy – believe me!
    I was thee yesterday but today things have improved – slightly.
    Batten down the hatches and hang in there!

  2. Ugh I so very much understand. Since NEW YEAR’S with a cold and the blowing and blocked ears thing is intolerable. Hope you feel better.

  3. Love this. Unfortunately, its not just your nose. There is a pack of marauding elephants stampeding across the land. The one in the lead is the worst.

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