Make America Gooder Again!

Make America Gooder Again! | The Return of the Modern PhilosopherOne of my favorite things about writing this blog, Modern Philosophers, is getting to interact with you.

Last night, I was grocery shopping and ran into my friend Trish, who immediately asked me when I was going to write about the RNC on my blog.

Reader feedback is crucial to my knowing what to right next, and I reminded Trish that I had just written a post about Scott Baio’s speech at the RNC (Charles in Charge of Homeland Security) and another about the possibility of Trump’s being that hairy orange monster that wanted to eat Bugs Bunny (Monster Trump).

The thing is, Modern Philosophers, my political posts are very hit and miss, so I try not to write too many of them.  They don’t seem to be popular with my loyal core of readers, but they have a tendency to get shared on other sites and read by total strangers.

Trish wanted more, though, and this blog is all about providing excellent customer service.

Of course, writing about the Republican National Convention is a bit of a challenge because I’m not sure I’m creative enough to come up with fake stories that are funnier and more ridiculous than the reality that the Republicans are providing…

Scott Baio as the big time celebrity speaker?  Trump’s wife possibly plagiarizing Michelle Obama’s speech?  Donald Trump receiving the Republican Party’s nomination?

Is Jason Wayward Pines' future version of Future President Trump?I was at a loss for what to write next, so I decided to check out what was on the DVR.  Do you watch Wayward Pines, Modern Philosophers?  I’m a big fan and read all the books after the first season ended.

In this week’s episode, Jason, the leader of the town, has to decide which citizens to save from an impending attack.  He orders the doc to make a list of people worthy of salvation, and mentions that the “defectives” should be left behind.

Doesn’t that sound like something Future President Trump could say the next time he stands in front of a microphone?  I shudder to think who would qualify as a defective in Trump’s mind, but something tells me it would be a very long list that might include the foreigners who are stealing our jobs, the Democrats, and anyone who doesn’t support his campaign with a blood lust.

While I know that Wayward Pines is fiction and set very far in the future, when I watch coverage of the Republican National Convention and listen to anything Trump has to say, it makes me wonder if our civilization is already spiraling into the decline that leads to the end of humans and the rise of the aberrations.

Would Trump's preisdency lead to the rise of the abbies?Is it that much of a stretch to think that after four years of President Trump, America would be crawling with abbies?

If the primary results are any indication, Americans are already evolving into mindless, bloodthirsty creatures who appear to want to destroy life as we know it.

Wayward Pines is surrounded by a giant electrified fence built to keep out unwanted immigrants.  I’m not sure if Pilcher made the abbies pay for the fence, but like Trump’s planned wall, it sends the message that if you’re different, you are not welcome.

It wouldn’t surprise me if Trump ordered episodes of Wayward Pines to be played on the giant screens at the RNC, made his people refer to foreigners as abbies,  and had his face digitally placed over Jason’s (while keeping Jason’s hair, of course!).

Don’t get me wrong, Modern Philosophers…I don’t actually believe that Donald Trump will set in motion a series of events the leads to the human race disappearing and evolving into a race of creatures with fangs and claws.

What keeps me awake at night, however, is the thought that Future President Trump would have the ability to launch a nuclear attack, and set in motion a series of events that wipes the human race from the planet.

Trump: The End of the World As We Know It?

Fireworks set off at the end of the Republican National Convention?

Trump could be the end of the world as we know it.

And I don’t feel fine.

I think I’d rather take my chances thousands of years in the future with the abbies than a few months from now with Future President Trump…

Even if you love Trump, you’re welcome to follow me on Pinterest!

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About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
This entry was posted in Humor, Politics and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

17 Responses to Make America Gooder Again!

  1. Brittany says:

    You’re not the only one terrified for the future of this country, that I promise you. While people chase imaginary creatures on their phones, we edge ever closer to apocalypse…

  2. ksbeth says:

    pretty scary that fiction could be truth.

  3. Gail Kaufman says:

    Hope life does not imitate art.

  4. After the whole Brexit nonsense here, I’m even more terrified that Trump will get in as now I have seen the unthinkable happen… I genuinely believe that he has a chance of getting in too. I enjoy your political posts – they keep me informed of what’s going on!

    • Austin says:

      Thanks, Suzie. I like to be your insider to American politics. I’m sure that’s giving you a very clear picture of what’s going on over here. 🙂

  5. In An Unguarded Moment says:

    I’ve been marveling at what’s going on over there in the USA for the last few months…. it’s something I wouldn’t have believed could happen earlier in the year. I’m pretty terrified of what could happen if he did get in. I too worry about the whole nuclear thing. Your election process seems to go on forever. Our election campaign this year (the longest we’ve ever had, I think) was 8 weeks, and we were all SO over it. Can’t imagine what it’s like over there when you have the primaries first (we don’t have anything like that) and then the actual campaign once the nominees are decided.

  6. Ocean Bream says:

    I agree, and I don’t even live in America. Because America is such a large power and influence on the world, I tremble to think of what new entitlement to destroy Trump will introduce and implement upon the world, as though the past wasn’t bad enough. What have the people unleashed?

  7. Bren says:

    I’ll play devils advocate here and state, I’d rather have a Trump in office than a Menopausal Clinton.

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