What if I actually live inside a snow globe?
Stay with me. You’ve heard stranger theories on this blog, and this one actually makes sense when you think about it.
First off, I’m always surrounded by snow.
Secondly, I’m very limited in how far I ever stray from The House on the Hill (as if a transparent globe were limiting my movements).
Thirdly, every time I think my life is calm and under control, something (or someone!) comes along and shakes it up until it’s a total mess, there’s snow everywhere, and I’m struggling to get my bearings and make sense of the world around me.
Yep. I live inside a snow globe.
Just the other day, there was no snow. Then we had a storm. The snow stopped and I went to bed. I woke up, and there was no everywhere. A couple of days later, the same thing happened.
It’s like whenever I go to bed and think all is well with the world, whoever owns the snow globe (and I’m pretty sure it’s Snow Miser), gives it a good shake so I wake up to find falling snow and total chaos for as far as the eye can see.
And this theory isn’t just limited to the weather, Modern Philosophers. My life is a snow globe all of the time.
Someone shakes my snow globe and Rachel decides it’s time to move away and chase her dream.
My writing career is going nowhere. Someone shakes my snow globe and suddenly I have a blog that is an unexpected success.
The blog is fun, but it’s not advancing my writing career. Someone shakes my snow globe and my post about The Walking Dead filming a live episode in Maine goes viral. I get offered a job writing The Nite Show.
Work starts to get stressful. Someone shakes my snow globe and we can work unlimited overtime. Work isn’t so bad now because there’s all that money and I finally don’t have to worry about financial stress. Someone shakes my snow globe and overtime gets cut back considerably. Work gets stressful again.
Driving in snow freaks me out to the point that I am almost paralyzed with fear. Someone shakes my snow globe and I finally get snow tires. Now I feel much more confident behind the wheel.
I really miss Rachel and don’t think I’ll ever find love again. Someone shakes my snow globe and I meet this beautiful blogger with an adorable accent. Someone shakes my snow globe and I realize she lives in Singapore. Someone shakes my snow globe and she decides to move back to Ireland and really wants to come visit me. She comes to America, we fall in love, and we plan to live together. Someone shakes my snow globe and she decides to stay in Ireland and never speak to me again.
Do you see the pattern here, Modern Philosophers? I’m definitely trapped inside a snow globe, right?
Surely, you don’t believe that we are in total control of our fate. You have to accept, at least to some degree, that there’s a higher power up there pulling the strings, setting things in motion, or shaking the snow globe.
I had the idea of God beaten into my brain by The Nuns and my stepmother from a very early age. I’m not exactly sure of what I believe anymore, but I’m willing to accept the possibility that there is a Master of the Snow Globe, who decides when to change my life with the flick of a wrist.
Maybe he shakes it on a whim, for his own amusement, or to intercede on my behalf. I have no idea.
Truth be told, this post has taken a complete turn from where I saw it going when I sat down to write it, Modern Philosophers. It’s as is someone shook my snow globe as I was writing this, and sent my Deep Thoughts in an entirely different direction.
At times, I hate living in a snow globe and knowing that more snow is coming, and someone else is in control of my destiny.
Then there are times when I love the idea of the snow globe. Who knew that Rachel and Melissa were out there waiting for me? How else would I have landed the gig writing for The Nite Show?
All I know is that this snow globe theory gives me hope. If life was just going to be the same old boring nonsense day after day, I’d die of boredom.
Never knowing when the next shake is going to come, and how it’s going to turn my life completely upside down, is what gets me out of bed every morning.
As The Beatles said so wisely, “Shake it up, baby!”.
What do you think of my snow globe theory? Agree with it or not, you should still follow my blog and follow me on Pinterest!