Life Inside My Snow Globe

life, philosophy, humor, snow globes, Maine, winter, Modern PhilosopherI had an epiphany today, Modern Philosophers, which I love since I was born on the Feast of the Epiphany (it’s not too late to send me a birthday present!)…

What if I actually live inside a snow globe?

Stay with me.  You’ve heard stranger theories on this blog, and this one actually makes sense when you think about it.

First off, I’m always surrounded by snow.

Secondly, I’m very limited in how far I ever stray from The House on the Hill (as if a transparent globe were limiting my movements).

Thirdly, every time I think my life is calm and under control, something (or someone!) comes along and shakes it up until it’s a total mess, there’s snow everywhere, and I’m struggling to get my bearings and make sense of the world around me.

Yep.  I live inside a snow globe.

Just the other day, there was no snow.  Then we had a storm.  The snow stopped and I went to bed.  I woke up, and there was no everywhere.  A couple of days later, the same thing happened.

It’s like whenever I go to bed and think all is well with the world, whoever owns the snow globe (and I’m pretty sure it’s Snow Miser), gives it a good shake so I wake up to find falling snow and total chaos for as far as the eye can see.

And this theory isn’t just limited to the weather, Modern Philosophers.  My life is a snow globe all of the time.

snow globes, life, relationships, philosophy, love, humor, Maine, Modern PhilosopherI’m lonely and depressed.  Someone shakes my snow globe and Rachel comes into my life.  Suddenly all is well, I’m happy, I’m in love, life is perfect.

Someone shakes my snow globe and Rachel decides it’s time to move away and chase her dream.

My writing career is going nowhere.  Someone shakes my snow globe and suddenly I have a blog that is an unexpected success.

The blog is fun, but it’s not advancing my writing career.  Someone shakes my snow globe and my post about The Walking Dead filming a live episode in Maine goes viral.  I get offered a job writing The Nite Show.

Work starts to get stressful.  Someone shakes my snow globe and we can work unlimited overtime.  Work isn’t so bad now because there’s all that money and I finally don’t have to worry about financial stress.  Someone shakes my snow globe and overtime gets cut back considerably.  Work gets stressful again.

Driving in snow freaks me out to the point that I am almost paralyzed with fear.  Someone shakes my snow globe and I finally get snow tires.  Now I feel much more confident behind the wheel.

I really miss Rachel and don’t think I’ll ever find love again.  Someone shakes my snow globe and I meet this beautiful blogger with an adorable accent.  Someone shakes my snow globe and I realize she lives in Singapore.  Someone shakes my snow globe and she decides to move back to Ireland and really wants to come visit me.  She comes to America, we fall in love, and we plan to live together.  Someone shakes my snow globe and she decides to stay in Ireland and never speak to me again.

Do you see the pattern here, Modern Philosophers?  I’m definitely trapped inside a snow globe, right?

fate, life, destiny, higher power, snow globes, philosophy, humor, Modern PhilosopherSurely, you don’t believe that we are in total control of our fate.  You have to accept, at least to some degree, that there’s a higher power up there pulling the strings, setting things in motion, or shaking the snow globe.

I had the idea of God beaten into my brain by The Nuns and my stepmother from a very early age.  I’m not exactly sure of what I believe anymore, but I’m willing to accept the possibility that there is a Master of the Snow Globe, who decides when to change my life with the flick of a wrist.

Maybe he shakes it on a whim, for his own amusement, or to intercede on my behalf.  I have no idea.

Truth be told, this post has taken a complete turn from where I saw it going when I sat down to write it, Modern Philosophers.  It’s as is someone shook my snow globe as I was writing this, and sent my Deep Thoughts in an entirely different direction.

At times, I hate living in a snow globe and knowing that more snow is coming, and someone else is in control of my destiny.

Then there are times when I love the idea of the snow globe.  Who knew that Rachel and Melissa were out there waiting for me?  How else would I have landed the gig writing for The Nite Show?

philosophy, humor, fate, destiny, snow globe, higher power, Modern PhilosopherMaybe this is all nonsense and my Post Traumatic Snow Disorder has flared up and is playing tricks on my brain.

All I know is that this snow globe theory gives me hope.  If life was just going to be the same old boring nonsense day after day, I’d die of boredom.

Never knowing when the next shake is going to come, and how it’s going to turn my life completely upside down, is what gets me out of bed every morning.

As The Beatles said so wisely, “Shake it up, baby!”.

What do you think of my snow globe theory?  Agree with it or not, you should still follow my blog and follow me on Pinterest!

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About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
This entry was posted in Humor, Philosophy and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

19 Responses to Life Inside My Snow Globe

  1. Yes I agree and disagree. How is that for a shake? I live inside a treadmill; so count your blessings….o wait you just did. ~~dru~~

  2. Allie P. says:

    Snow is the falling white death in my neck of the woods. But I hope this next shake of the ol’ globe puts you back on the good luck track.

  3. ksbeth says:

    life is like that, just when you get the driveway shoveled, an unexpected blizzard hits.

  4. susielindau says:

    I’ve had many moments in that snow globe! It’s easy to feel out of control of things especially where relationships are concerned.
    I’m glad you finally got snow tires. 🙂 Happy Birthday!

  5. tarnegolita says:

    Post Traumatic Snow Disorder 😂 Very clever!! I definitely live inside a bubble. The kibbutz is my bubble. I don’t go out if I can help it. I don’t mind! Everything I value is inside the bubble. The only thing is, no snow here so it’s probably a soap bubble. I think you should focus on trying to attract good things into your snow globe! And then get the person shaking it sonething else to do! 😉 X

  6. I love the analogy! I never thought of it that way. I can see why you are such a creative writer. I understand life in the snow globe, too. Wishing you a happy new year and that your snow globe gets a good shake and stays in a good place.

  7. Jennifer says:

    And what if you are actually the one shaking the snow globe of your life?

  8. I’d rather have a sunshine globe that, when shaken, showers only blessings and light.

  9. Mainly fog here, in the literal and the metaphorical sense.

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