Promising Pizza Progress

cooking, food, bachelor chef, humor, Modern PhilosopherOne thing I know for sure, Modern Philosophers, is that you’ll never catch me wearing a toga with “World’s Greatest Chef” emblazoned across the front.

It’s not that I’m a bad cook.  In fact, my generous waistline seems to indicate that I do a very good job of preparing delicious food.  I’ve been divorced for fourteen years now, and while J was definitely the head chef during our marriage, I’ve had to begrudgingly take over control of the Divorce Dude’s Diner.

Obviously, I haven’t starved to death.  My menu has slowly increased over the years as I’ve learned how to make more meals.  I almost always cook a big meal on Sunday that I can heat up after work all week, and I wouldn’t be afraid to prepare dinner for a friend.

Some nights, though, quick and easy is all I can handle.  Today was a particularly long day at work, so all I wanted to do was pop a frozen pizza in the oven when I returned to The House on the Hill.

Sounds simple enough, right?


The last time I made a frozen pizza, I kinda, sorta forget to remove the pie from the cardboard circle when I put it in the oven, and was lucky not to have started a fire.

cooking, food, bachelor chef, humor, Modern PhilosopherWhat’s that damn circle for anyway? I’ve always assumed it was to be used as a poor man’s cutting board on which to slice the pizza after it’s been cooked.  My friends, however, disagree and say it’s just there to keep the pizza from bending in the box.

But how in the world is a frozen pizza going to bend?  I dispute that theory!

Is it some sort of packaging crop circle added to the box by Aliens in an attempt to send us a message that our tiny minds cannot yet comprehend?

As you can see from the first photo, I made progress in the kitchen this week.  I actually remembered to remove the mysterious cardboard circle before sliding the pizza into the oven.

I posted the photo on Facebook, and one of my friends commented that by removing the cardboard, I just took away all the pizza’s flavor.

Ha!  I have such witty friends.

cooking, food, bachelor chef, humor, Modern PhilosopherIn the end, it was a tasty and easy to prepare meal.  Now I can just fall asleep on the couch watching TV.  The way life is supposed to be!

I hope you’ll all weigh in down in the comments section as to what you think is the purpose of the cardboard circle that comes with every frozen pizza.  We must get to the bottom of this mystery that has puzzled mankind for ages!

After that, please remember to follow me on my blog and on Pinterest!

About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
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29 Responses to Promising Pizza Progress

  1. grannyK says:

    I think it’s a free Frisbee!

  2. Laurie O says:

    It’s dual purpose – cutting board and serving tray. In fact it pisses me off when there isn’t a cardboard circle, like Red Barron. Then you have to flatten and use the box. Not classy! Lol

  3. Sofia Leo says:

    We don’t eat frozen pizza in my house because we believe that cardboard circle is a Veterinarian Enrichment tool, or so it ends up being once the dog has fished it out of the recycle bin and eaten it, only to require an expensive visit to said veterinarian for treatment the next day…If you ever visit Oregon, stop on by and I’ll make you a lovely pizza, from scratch, your choice of toppings – you’ll never eat frozen again 🙂

  4. Its to draw faces on while you wait for the pizza to cook

  5. ksbeth says:

    italian boomerang

  6. davidprosser says:

    Obviously it’s so you know which is the bottom. Unless of course it’s a microwave pizza in which case it’s a mirror to see how burned your lips get.

  7. Ocean Bream says:

    I always thought it was what you said – a handy chopping board to chop your pizza up into slices! I always felt annoyed that the instructions said to throw it away – now what am I going to cook my pizza on?!

  8. Louise says:

    just another useless piece of garbage to add to the mountains of garbage already building in the world. Or a medieval timer, when it begins to smoke its time to either check the pizza or take it out of oven.

  9. Its a plate. So not only do you not have to cook, you have no dish clean up either. 😆

  10. theunshackledthoughtsofadreamer says:

    Obviously it’s there to give the pizza extra flavour. xD

  11. The Hook says:

    I can barely make scrambled eggs, buddy… you’ll get there.

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