It’s Hot, I’m Cool

Maine, Spring, heat wave, poetry, humor, Modern PhilosopherWalking around

Like a bad ass

In my Kylo Ren

Tee shirt,

Sweating in the

Ninety degree heat,

And being

Totally cool

With it.

Why don’t I care

That a heat wave

Is scorching Maine

And the sun

Is relentlessly


My sweat glands?

Simply because

It can’t snow

When the mercury

Is pushing triple digits!

Ninety-five degrees

On May 18th?

I’m cool with that.

Perspiring like a

Sweaty-toothed madman

As I accumulate

Over 17,000 steps

Under the watchful glare

Of the blazing sun?

I’m cool with that.

Snow Miser be gone!

In Heat Miser

We trust!

Bring the heat.

I can always hide

In the super chilled


Of my basement bunker.

As long as

I can lock away

My snow shovel,

Life is good.

And I make sure

To apply

Massive amounts

Of deodorant,

Of course.

I know

This poem

Is strange,

But I blame it

On the heat…

And other

Delightful distractions.

Stay cool.

Be cool.

It’s extremely hot,

And I’m wicked cool

With that.

It’s hot.  Be cool and follow me on my blog.  And on Pinterest!

About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
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9 Responses to It’s Hot, I’m Cool

  1. Lutheranliar says:

    You are indeed cool, Modern Philosopher!

  2. Ficklefifty says:

    Did you just tell your age with the Heat Miser comment? Doh…Just drink lots of cold water, works wonders in the scorching sun. Nice poem.

  3. This is the coolest poem that I’ve ever read! 😉

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