The interns might be annoying, but they do know how to keep the Deep Thoughts flowing.
It was the one with the nose ring who brought up the question that kicked off today’s great debate…
If a tree falls in the forest, would Trump blame Obama?
We’re still debating this one, but I stepped away for a few minutes to get some Snapple and write this post.
Everyone involved agreed that President Trump would definitely blame someone for what happened to the tree. We just couldn’t come to a consensus as to who would be on the receiving end of the numerous Twitter rants about the incident.
President Obama was the obvious first choice since Trump seems to have a real hard on for his predecessor, and loves to play the blame game with him. As far as the current occupant of the Oval Office seems to be concerned, everything that goes wrong with America was somehow caused by the man who sat at the big desk before him.
Of course, Trump’s main concern would probably be that Obama refuses to prove he was born in America, and Republicans cannot stand it when foreigners take work away from people who can prove they were born here.
If anyone is going to take down a tree in this country, it better be someone in a Make America Great Again hat. Or by a Trump supporter who is part of a union crew clearing land for the construction of the next great Trump building or golf course.
And the tree in question better not fall anywhere near a Confederate monument. Because Trump would tell you that would be a part of the ongoing Democratic conspiracy to keep America from knowing about its history. Definitely an item very high on President Obama’s secret agenda, which he came up with while growing up in Kenya.
One of the interns asked how the fallen tree was going to be cleared away since Trump had probably cut the budget to the National Forest Service. That set off quite the debate because we all agreed that President Trump obviously knew nothing about how to take care of such a menial task.
One theory was that Trump would hold a rally around the tree, and use it as an opportunity to further disparage Obama in a rousing speech given to the “largest audience ever assembled at a rally set around a fallen tree in the history of ever”.
Because if Obama somehow wasn’t responsible for knocking down the tree, it was definitely the work of some foreigners who are in the country illegally.
Taking down trees is clearly the m.o. of bad hombres, and if we can’t keep our trees safe, how the hell are we going to protect our women and children from “those people”?
Trump could really milk it and vow that the fallen tree would become part of the wall, which means Mexico would have to pay to have it removed.
But what if Trump wanted to go in an entirely different direction and blame someone other than President Obama for what happened to the tree?
The intern who always wears the “I’m With Her” pin, despite the election being long over, suggested that Hillary (big surprise!) would be fingered as the tree killer.
She did make a good point, though. Crooked Hillary never got the punishment Trump promised her during the debates. This makes him look weak to his supporters, and Melania does not like it when Donald looks weak.
So Treegate could definitely be a way to ensure that Hillary got what was coming to her for whatever it was Trump thinks she did.
Check her emails. She probably sent one to Bill or one or her cronies about it.
As the debate heated up, we realized that Trump could blame the fallen tree on anyone who was not in his good graces at the moment. Jeff Session, Rex Tillerson, John Kelly, the White House butler who brought him a Coke that was only lukewarm…they could all take the fall for that tree in the forest.
There is only one fallen tree, right? Because this list of suspects is long enough to destroy a forest faster than a California wildfire.
I threw Bernie Sanders out there as a suggestion, not because I thought Bernie would ever hurt a tree, but because I would love to hear his heated rebuke of President Trump’s accusations on the matter.
The intern who rarely speaks because he’s always on his laptop surprised us all with a suggestion we hadn’t even considered.
This would be the perfect opportunity for Trump to demand the hackers be brought to justice, and then have them silenced forever so they couldn’t admit to their part in helping him win the election.
Of course, he’d have to get the okay from Putin to make such an accusation, and we didn’t see that as being a realistic possibility.
But when has something like logic, getting the proper consent, or playing fair ever stopped President Trump from acting?
Let’s be honest, that tree did not fall on its own. This is Trump’s America, which means someone’s going to have to take the blame. And it needs to happen before Eric goes out to look at the tree and gets his head stuck inside it…
I think this debate will rage on all night. If you’re interested in joining the fun, stop by The House on the Hill, or share your Deep Thoughts in the comments section below.