How To Date Like A Snowman

dating, relationships, humor, Modern PhilosopherHow’s it going, Modern Philosophers?

I’m just in from shoveling snow, which got me to thinking that the holidays will soon be upon us.  And no one likes to be single for the holidays.

Trust me, I know this from far too much experience.

Now that I’m inside and thawed out, I thought that I would share some dating advice to help you all find that someone special for the holiday season.

Don’t be dissuaded from using my words of wisdom simply because I’m perpetually single.  This is awesome advice, and it should totally work as long as you are not jinxed in relationships like I am.

Having been inspired by my time out in the snow, I’m going to advise you on how to date like a snowman…

dating, relationships, humor, Modern PhilosopherDress for Success. Snowmen don’t wear much, but what they do put on, shows that they are totally classy.

They’re almost always sporting a stylish hat and a colorful scarf.

Learn from the snowman.  Keep it simple, but make a lasting impression.

Be Positive. Have you ever seen a snowman that wasn’t smiling?  Maybe in that nightmare you have where snowmen break into your house and try to rebuild you, but in real life, those guys are always grinning.

Learn from the snowman.  He’s out in the freezing cold all day, barely dressed, but he’s got a thousand watt smile to keep him comfortable.

The saying might be that opposites attract, but I’m here to tell you that positives attract.  Keep it all sunshine and unicorns, and your date will be a success.

dating, relationships, humor, Modern PhilosopherListen to Her.  Aside from Frosty, snowmen don’t talk very much.

Follow that lead.  Don’t dominate the conversation.  Don’t make the whole date about you.

Listen to her.  Let her tell you about her, about her life, about her cats.  It doesn’t matter, dude.  Just listen.  She wants to know that you hear her, and that you care.

Be Cool.  Is anyone cooler than a snowman?  Out in the sub-freezing temps all day, just hanging out, never in a rush to get anywhere because no one tells a snowman what to do.

Your date will dig that vibe, too.  Show her that you are totally unflappable.  You just go with the flow.  It’s all good.

A snowman never lets you see him sweat.  Make that your dating mantra.

dating, relationships, humor, Modern PhilosopherDon’t Worry About Body Image.  Don’t be that guy who spends so much time worrying about how he looks that he doesn’t properly prepare for a date.

Also, don’t fret that you’re not good looking enough for her, or that she’s totally out of your league.  Just be you.

Snowmen are all fat, with skinny arms, and big, round, bald heads.  You never see a snowman working out or buying a wig, right?  That’s because he’s confident in who he is.

You need to be snowman confident.  Your date will notice because confidence is sexy.

Blame the Weather.  If for some reason the date turns out to be a total disaster, and you need to being it to a merciful end, blame the weather. Just tell her you need to leave before you melt.  She’s can’t argue with that.

I hope this advice has helped.  Good luck finding your special someone!

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About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
This entry was posted in Dating, Holidays and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

12 Responses to How To Date Like A Snowman

  1. Bryntin says:

    Excellent advice Austin and I know it all works. For example, I am never without a hat and I have plenty of requests for dates. This is great generally but my wife isn’t so keen.

  2. ksbeth says:

    great wintry mix advice )

  3. markbialczak says:

    But be sparing with the cold shoulder … otherwise, great advice, Austin.

  4. Austin, as a guy who’s been married for a couple of decades, I can tell you your advice applies to keeping my monogamous relationship working too.

  5. cat9984 says:

    Great advice for any relationship

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