I Can See Clearly Now (Supposedly)

eye doctor, new glasses, humor, Modern PhilosopherI can confirm, Modern Philosophers, that my fear of doctors extends to the eye doctor.

I haven’t been to the optometrist in over two years.  In fact, the last time I went was during one of The Sweet Irish Girl’s visits.  On that occasion, I literally had someone to hold my hand to get me through the experience.  She also picked out my cool new glasses.

Today, I was on my own.  I’d ignored the “You need to make an appointment” reminders the office had sent me over the summer, so I was overdue to have my eyes checked.

I actually caved and called to make an appointment.  I’d been having headaches, things looked a little blurry after all day on the computer, and the new lights at work were causing a problem.

What better time to go to the eye doctor than during Christmas vacation?

As expected, I was nervous.  One of my female friends gave me a hard time when I told her I didn’t like going to the eye doctor.  She reminded me it wasn’t like she was going to give me a pap smear or a mammogram.

I knew she was right, but that didn’t make me any less anxious.

eye doctor, new glasses, humor, Modern PhilosopherI was worried that she would link the headaches to a tumor, tell me I was going blind, or that I needed eye surgery.

I can’t help it.  I’m a writer with a wild imagination.  I can think up dozens of horrible scenarios when left alone in the chair waiting for the doctor to arrive.

My doctor was new, as my regular doctor didn’t have any openings for months.  She was young and very pretty.  Which meant I was also dealing with how ridiculously awkward I get around attractive members of the opposite sex.

How awkward could I be during an eye exam?  I actually asked her these questions:

Do you think your patients find it comforting or alarming that you wear glasses?

In our high tech world, why are we still using this archaic “lens 1 or lens 2?” device to test our eyes?  Shouldn’t the computers be doing this?  Or lasers?

She was a good sport about it, and we actually had a nice conversation about both my weird questions, but still.  Why am I so weird???

It turns out my vision hadn’t worsened that much since my last appointment, but my left eye was clearly weaker than the left.  We talked about a blue light coating for my glasses, which might help with the headaches, and she made me promise not to wait so long between appointments again.

eye doctor, new glasses, humor, Modern PhilosopherClearly, she’s looking forward to fielding more of my awkward questions!

I found frames that were almost identical to my current ones, and I should have my new glasses in about a week.

Given all the time I spend on the computer, I’m looking forward to trying out the new specs and seeing if I see better.

All in all, going to the eye doctor wasn’t the horrible experience I’d imagined it to be, but had it been, it would have led to a much more exciting blog post…

About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
This entry was posted in Humor and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

12 Responses to I Can See Clearly Now (Supposedly)

  1. cbiz50 says:

    Now that you have a pretty optometrist you may have an incentive. Actually you should make your next appointment when leaving the current one…keeps one on a schedule and lessens anxiety

  2. ksbeth says:

    i’m glad you went, i’m like that with the dentist and know it can be anxiety ridden. sounds like it all went well overall

  3. Ashana M says:

    I sometimes wonder the same thing…why am I so weird?

  4. markbialczak says:

    Think of her as the eye tester instead of the eye doctor and your anxiety will diminish, Austin. Unless I’ve forgotten about your fear of tests!

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