Why Can’t I Be Invincible, Too?

wear a mask, social distance, humor, Modern PhilosopherI’m beginning to wish that I could be invincible, too, Modern Philosophers.

I’ve given it a lot of thought, and the only reasonable explanation I can come up with for why people refuse to wear masks during a pandemic is because they are invincible.

I’m not sure how they attained that status, but if it is available for them, it had better be an option for me, too.

It’s like in grammar school when they teacher caught you sneaking a snack.  She’d scold you and say “I hope you brought enough for everyone”.

Well, there had better be enough invincibility to go around for everywhere, or I’m going to be really pissed!

Maybe this is my fault.  I’m leaning heavily on my Inner Introvert lately to get through this crisis, so maybe I missed the memo about Invincibility Testing.  I also ignore any calls on my cell from unknown numbers, so perhaps that was how people were informed about becoming invincible.

wear a mask, social distance, humor, Modern PhilosopherI try to be open-minded, but it appears to me that most of the non-mask wearing invincibles are Trump supporters.

Is it possible that he gifted his people with invincibility?  Is that why they are so loyal to him despite behaviors that prove Trump is more an insecure and belligerent brat than a caring and responsible President?

That would explain a lot to be honest.

Every time I leave The House on the Hill, a little voice tells me not to go because the virus and death are out there.  I try to get myself to stop doing that little voice, but it’s just a habit now.  I ignore the warning not because I feel invincible, but because I need to earn a paycheck, gather supplies, and not allow myself to become a paranoid shut in.

I also carry a mask.  If I’m just going to my car, there’s no need to put it on, but I know where it is for when I reach my destination.  If I’m going for a run, it’s in my pocket to put on the moment I see another person.

I hate to admit it, but I’m losing the battle to the paranoid shut in.  I never want to leave the house.  Last weekend, a friend tried to lure me out to go for a walk with her and enjoy the sunshine.  As much as I wanted to join her, I was too scared to say yes.

wear a mask, social distance, humor, Modern PhilosopherSure, Maine is the state with the fifth lowest  total of Coronavirus cases, and there have only been 8 cases in my zip code.  That being said, I’ve also seen and written enough horror movies to know that it’s the second you let your guard down that the killer gets you.  The more cocky you are, the quicker and more brutally you die.

When I’m out for a run, and I see another person approaching, I never wait to see if that person puts on a mask or crosses the street to avoid me.  I’m not playing chicken with COVID-19, Modern Philosophers.  I put on my mask and take the necessary precautions.

For the record, back in the early days of this, when I’d see another person, I used to turn around and run in the other direction.  Now I put on my mask, create as much space as possible between the invincible and me, and pick up the pace.  So that’s progress.

But I just don’t get the attitude of the other people who are out in public and don’t put on a mask when they see me coming.  For all they know, I could be hopped up on Coronavirus germs and about to sneeze when we cross paths.

Those invincibles are so damn cocky.  Must be nice to know that the deadly virus can’t touch you.  I wish I could have the same peace of mind.

It’s no picnic getting freaked out anytime someone comes a little too close, especially when they can’t bother to put on a mask.

I’d like to be able to accept an invitation to join a friend in an activity without having to calculate my likelihood of getting infected were I to do so.

I hate that the first thing I do every morning upon waking is swallowing so I can see if I have a sore throat.

wear a mask, social distance, humor, Modern PhilosopherAnd I really would love to lose that sinking feeling I get in my stomach every morning when they take my temperature upon my arrival at work.  It’s always normal, but that doesn’t mean I’m not worried that the thermometer will reveal a fever.

If I were invincible, I wouldn’t have to worry about any of those thing.

Why can’t I be invincible, too?

About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
This entry was posted in Fitness, Humor and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to Why Can’t I Be Invincible, Too?

  1. beth says:

    hang in there and walk or meet up with others while staying 6 feet apart as a viable option?

  2. markbialczak says:

    I am attempting to be as normal as possible while keeping six feet apart and wearing the mask in public places, Austin. I know what you mean about not letting the guard down.

  3. It appears all the Sturgis bikers in South Dakota believe they are invincible. Curious to see what the Corornavirus numbers do after these imbecile invincible’s return home.

  4. Pingback: The week gone by — Aug 9 – A Silly Place

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