Life in the Time of Trump and Coronavirus is very stressful, and my already high anxiety levels are now through the roof.
So I’ve sequestered myself at The House on the Hill this weekend in hopes of finding a solution to the problem. There has to be a way to introduce a little sunshine, rainbows, and unicorns to a world overrun by death, doom, and negativity.
Without any hope, we are trapped in the darkest, scariest version of Groundhog Day you’ve ever seen.
Luckily, I think I’ve come up with the perfect solution…
Let’s start celebrating Christmas now!
Christmas gets me through Maine’s dark, dreary, frigid, and snowy Winters every year, so why not enlist its superpowers to get us through the darkest times in recent history?
The Christmas Season is the hap, hap, happiest season of all, so let’s unleash it now and see if it can cancel out Corona Season and put Trump on mute.
There’s something magical about the Christmas Season. The colorful lights, the merry carols, the festive decorations, the endless parties, and all that food puts everyone in a better mood.
And let’s not forget all the Christmas movies and specials. We’re going to run out of TV shows to watch soon since Hollywood has been closed down due to the pandemic, but who needs new programming when you’ve got the holiday classics?
We can break out our ugly Christmas sweaters and Santa hats, put antlers on the pets, and come up with festive masks to wear to celebrate the season (while also helping to keep the virus in check and the people around us safe!).
Christmas shopping, if done with proper social distancing, is not only a much needed distraction during a stressful time, but also a wonderful way to boost the economy and help local small businesses.
And who couldn’t use a little eggnog right about now?
I’m not saying move up Christmas. That needs to stay right where it is on the calendar. Let’s just start celebrating the season now. That would give us four months of Christmas, which is probably just enough time for the Hallmark Channel to air all of its Christmas movies. It’s also a third of the year that can be exponentially happier than the two thirds that preceeded it.
Besides, we need to start writing our letters to Santa Claus now just in case Ebeneezer Trump decides to close the post office. If that happens, there’s no guarantee our wish lists will arrive at The North Pole in time!
So who’s with me on this?
Who thinks we should start celebrating Christmas now? Who wants to kick off the celebration by sending Christmas cookies, cakes, and presents to The House on the Hill?