Why Did I Move To The Arctic Circle?

short story, Maine, humor, Modern Philosopher“Why did I move to the Arctic Circle?” Aaron asked as he shivered on his bench on his side of the path.

Holly sipped her coffee, stamped her feet to keep them warm, and stared across at her best friend from her bench.

“You’re the one who insists on going for these walks even when it’s this cold,” she reminded him as she returned her mask to the ready position.

“What is it?  Like thirty below?” he questioned as he sat on his hands to warm them.

Holly quickly checked her phone.

“It’s eight degrees,” she informed him.

“Check it again,” Aaron insisted.  “You must have it set on Celsius or something.”

Holly didn’t bother to state that had her phone been set to Celsius, the temperature reading would have been even lower.  It was never a good idea to argue with Aaron, but definitely a horrible idea when he was bitching about the weather in any manner.

“Still eight degrees,” she assured him without even bothering to glance at her phone.

short story, Maine, humor, Modern Philosopher“Why did I move here?” he asked again.

“Your answer to that one varies depending on your mood and who asks,” she reminded him.  “You’ve told me multiple times, though, that it was because you wanted to get away from big city life.  And you were tempted by the world in Stephen King’s novels.”

“Which really doesn’t make sense because he writes horror, and depicts Maine as a place that attracts psychos, aliens, and monsters.  Guess it gives us some intriguing insight into your psyche, though.”

Aaron took a long sip of his Snapple and sighed.

“It’s all Stephen King’s fault,” he mumbled.  “If it weren’t so cold, I’d head over to his house to give him a piece of my mind.”

For the uninformed, Stephen King’s home wasn’t very far from where they were sitting.

“Wasn’t it ever cold in New York?” Holly asked as she placed her coffee cup against her cheek in hopes of returning the sense of feeling to her face.

“Sure, but not like this,” he explained.  “You’ve got all those big buildings to block the wind.  And when it snowed, you just took the subway to your destination.  You didn’t have to worry about driving in it.”

“So why did you move here, city slicker?” she challenged with a smile that he could not see because of her mask.

Aaron shrugged.  “On days like this, I really question that decision.  Of course, if I hadn’t moved here, I never would have met you.”

short story, Maine, humor, Modern Philosopher“Awww.”  She rolled her eyes.  “I know you only said that to stay on my good side because you’ll need me to carry you home if you pass out from the cold.”

“You know me so well,” Aaron chuckled.  “Now let’s get the hell out of here before my pants freeze to this bench…”

About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
This entry was posted in Humor and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Why Did I Move To The Arctic Circle?

  1. beth says:

    never let your pants freeze to the bench – a good tip

  2. markbialczak says:

    The cold spell has overtaken the Syracuse area, too, Austin.

  3. Pingback: The week gone by — Feb. 7 – A Silly Place

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s