It’s Hard To Die With The Sixth Sense

“I have a new movie mash-up to share!” Aaron declared with all the pomp and circumstance worthy of such important news.

Holly clapped enthusiastically, and eventually rose to make it a standing ovation.

She loved Aaron’s movie mash-ups.  Her best friend, the aspiring screenwriter, loved to take two flicks and merge them into one.  Often the films had a similar theme, or a shared actor or director.  Other times, they seemingly had nothing in common until Aaron’s wild imagination took over and made the link obvious.

“This one combines Die Hard and The Sixth Sense,” he announced with a sly grin.

Again Holly applauded.  “I love me some Bruce Willis.  And that would have to be the creepiest Christmas film ever.”

“Exactly,” Aaron agreed and took a long sip of his Snapple to prepare for his pitch.

short story, humor, Modern PhilosopherIt was a gloomy Sunday morning in Maine.  Hurricane Henri was slowly making its way up the Atlantic Coast, and as a result, the skies were overwhelmed with storm clouds.  It was the perfect setting for Aaron to share his ghost story.

“Bruce Willis plays John McClane,” he began to weave his tale.  “When the movie starts, he has no idea he’s dead.  He thinks he’s headed out to the West Coast for Christmas to win his wife back after she left him, but she’s really moved and changed her last name to get a fresh start after her husband’s tragic death in the line of duty…”

Holly sipped her coffee and nodded in agreement.

“That is an awesome hook,” she agreed.

“When McClane gets to Nakatomi Plaza, he can’t find Holly, the Christmas party is in full swing, and then Hans and his guys arrive.  McClane’s cop instincts kick in, and he sets out to save Holly and the others from the terrorists…”

“What he doesn’t realize, though, is that he can’t move on to the afterlife because he has unfinished business,” Aaron continued.  “He was murdered before he could solve his final case, so now he’s destined to walk the earth until he gets closure by closing an even more important case.”

He paused for another drink of Snapple, so Holly took the opportunity to chime in: “You can also add that he never had a chance to say goodbye to Holly since he died at work, so this gives him that one last opportunity to see her before he passes on…”

Aaron’s eyes lit up and he extended his arm for a high five.  Holly slapped it enthusiastically because she rarely got the chance to make one of his awesome mash-ups even better.

“So now Hans and his boys are basically fighting a ghost on Christmas Eve,” Aaron gushed.  “Nakatomi Plaza is now an enormous haunted house, and McClane is the Christmas Ghost from Hell.  You can’t kill a ghost, so the bad guys are really up against it.”

“It’s almost like McClane has this sixth sense that he’s dead, and he wants to kill as many baddies as possible so he has some company while he’s trapped between the planes of existence.  Who knew a Die Hard flick could be so deep?”

Holly giggled at his comment.

Bruce Willis, flash fiction, Modern Philosopher“So where does the Haley Joel Osment character fit into all this?” she asked.  “Because it’s not a true mash up until a character creepily utters the ‘I see dead people‘ line.”

Aaron nodded in agreement.  “That’s where Sargent Powell comes in, my dear.  This lonely, eccentric desk jockey has a secret talent that he doesn’t want his bosses to know about because he fears it will get him thrown off the force.  But when the call comes in for him to check out the disturbance at Nakatomi Plaza, he quickly realizes he is dealing with a ghost who doesn’t realize he’s dead.”

“Would you cast Osment or Reginald VelJohnson in the role?” she wondered.

Aaron shrugged.  “I just write the script.  Casting is out of my hands.”

McClane still saves the day, Powell gets his redemption, and then there’s that magical moment where McClane realizes he’s dead, but his wife…”

“Who is named Holly, I have to point out,” Holly interrupted to point out.

“Yes, Holly, somehow senses his presence and they get their final goodbye just as the clock strikes midnight and it’s Christmas morning,” Aaron concluded.

“Wow!” Holly exclaimed.  “I’d watch that movie multiple times.  Hell, I’d buy it on DVD and Blu-Ray.  You need to start writing it immediately.”

“If only all the parties involved would allow me to steal their characters to do so…”

They sighed in unison.

“Why does Hollywood have to suck like that?” Holly asked.

Aaron just shrugged.  “Yippee ki yay…”

They both laughed and stared out at the river…

About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
This entry was posted in Humor and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to It’s Hard To Die With The Sixth Sense

  1. kristianw84 says:

    I love the movie mash-up idea!! I’d watch that movie too!!

  2. markbialczak says:

    Pitch it to Bruce’s people, Austin. He’d want it done somehow!

  3. Ocean Bream says:

    It’s a shame Hollywood won’t accept ‘fanfic’ movie mash-up ideas! This sounds brilliant! I loved the sixth sense and never got into any Die-Hards… but this is awesome. Lovely way to put it forward too. Really enjoyed this 😀

  4. Pingback: The week gone by — Aug. 29 – A Silly Place

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