I am a screenwriter currently doing deep undercover work as a mindless stiff at a “real” job. This blog is my way of getting my deeper thoughts out into the world so that I can clear space for the ideas I need to write my scripts.
Some readers have asked me to expand on this page, specifically asking me why this is called “The Return of the Modern Philosopher.” When did the Modern Philosopher ever leave? Is he staying this time?
Alas, I will offer up some more information…”Modern Philosophers” was the name of a screenplay I wrote in my early 20s. It was a Finalist in some screenwriting competition, and I thought it was the script that was going to jump start my career. I even published a zine to help publicize the screenplay. All the articles were written by me or by characters in the script (aka me) except for one written by my buddy Dave.
The zine was fun, but it was too expensive to produce more than that first issue. I did, however, get it into several comic book stores across the country and managed to sell some copies. That was a blast.
The script never went anywhere, and looking back at it all these years later, I realize it wasn’t very good. That makes me happy, though, because it confirms that my writing style has evolved and improved. Phew!
At this point, I’ve had two screenplays produced. One movie was released only in the UK. The other is in some sort of production limbo right now. I’m going to post the trailers here, though, if you’d like to see what the screenwriting side of my brain can produce.
The first trailer is for The Retirement Party, which is a romantic comedy about a guy who decides to retire from dating after realizing that he can not be with his true love. That one is based on my life, and that handsome lead actor is playing a thinly veiled version of me.
The second trailer is for A Perfect Life. Someone else wrote the original script, but I was brought in to do the rewrite, and it was my last draft that was used as the shooting script.
So, as you can see, I’ve made some progress as a screenwriter, but not enough to leave me satisfied. I’m always happiest when I’m writing, and I plan to never give up on my goal of being able to support myself solely through my writing.
I’m going to update this to say that now I’m a writer for a late night talk show in Maine called The Nite Show With Danny Cashman. This season, I made my acting debut in a sketch that I also wrote. Here it is for your viewing pleasure…
Lastly, I’m from New York, but now I live in Maine. I apologize if my harsh Brooklyn accent slips out from time to time in my posts.
Now enough with the serious nonsense. Go read the blog and have a good laugh.
Thanks for reading. Enjoy the Deep Thoughts!
Queens and, yes, I do miss it for many reasons, including sidewalks, flat roads, and friends and neighbors hanging out in the street.
Queens always makes me think of the Mets and the US Open. 🙂
Love the accent…keep it comin’!
Thanks for reading about and “liking” my blog on my three graduates and also my water bug experience! I appreciate the notice. Like what I see here too!
Thanks. Please feel free to hang around. Always looking to recruit new Modern Philosophers to the cause. 🙂
Now I want to see the first movie. The other seems a bit scary. I don’t like things that are scary. I try to avoid them. But I am happy for you. What an achievment. The two trailers next to each other make you look bipolar. Nice and inoccent, then fast and scary. I know you didn’t write the seond one, but still. (I also realize that it is the improper use of the word bipolar)
I rewrote the second one. I took two terribly confusing scripts, and rewrote them, turning in 6 drafts before the first day of shooting. It was my final draft that was the shooting script for the film. Someone else might have written the original story, but the one up on the screen is mine!
As for The Retirement Party, that is about one of my break ups, so the character in the flick is me. I do love the idea of that. My broken heart was turned into a movie. Take that, heartbreak! 😉
Kind of like how people write songs about heartbreak and get famous.
I think it’s great.
Can’t wait to see it.
I don’t know if it will ever be released. Too bad.
The director and I might make another movie together, though, and I’m very excited about that!
I don’t get it I thought it was released in England. Or are you talking about the second film?
The thriller was released in the UK. Maybe you can find it on your side of the pond. I have a copy here on DVD, which the director was nice enough to send to me. 🙂
Pleased to have found your arresting blog Austin. Looking forward to reading more here and rooting for your career ambitions. Regards from Thom at the immortal jukebox (take a break – give it a spin).
Thanks, Thom. Welcome to the blog…
Thanks. Hope you’ll check out the Jukebox.
I’ll check it out…
Hi Austin, I wrote a post a while ago mentioning your blog, and it has been featured on Freshly Pressed! Would be lovely if you checked it out!
Nice post. Thanks for the mention. I shared it on Twitter. 🙂
Hey Austin, my blogging friend! It’s time to pull on your smartest tux! I have nominated you for The Very Inspiring Blog Award! You know that I love your blog. You don’t have to accept this award, but I would love for you to pop over to my blog and come celebrate! There will be imaginary champagne and glitter! Bring Gary, too! http://insidethelifeofmoi.wordpress.com/2014/11/03/my-big-fat-award-ceremony/
Thank you, my dear. Making me blush yet again! You’re so good at that!
You are welcome 🙂
Fun…looking forward to peeking around!
Thank you. Welcome to the blog. I am always looking for new Modern Philosophers. 🙂
hi Austin. Still getting through all your blogs. I have started Blogging 201 , well in dec. Did you do any of that stuff. I found the photo one kinda helpful. Anyway I was wondering can I sorta steal
(oops) share your basic ideals . I was thinking of calling my next blog. “Sundays downunder.”
You have a nice smile .
No, I did not do any of that stuff. I have too many ideas in my head to need writing prompts. 🙂
Feel free to share the Modern Philosopher ideals…
Recently found your blog, and must say that I’m enjoying every post. Keep up the good work Sir!
Thank you. Welcome and enjoy your time here. 🙂
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Hey! I nominated you for the ‘One Lovely Blog Award’.
Check it out here: http://dancingtotherain.wordpress.com/2014/12/07/the-one-lovely-blog-award-nomination/
Thanks for stopping by my blog, I look forward to following yours!
Thanks, Julia. 🙂
I really enjoy your blog, Austin.
I must since it takes a lot for an Orioles fan to support a Yankees fan! (I say that in jest! 🙂 )
Ha! You guys had a great season this year. Sorry it ended so abruptly, though.
Glad I found your blog – nothing better than a funny New Yawka 🙂 I was born in Queens…or as I usually say “Lunguylund Jewish” – thanks for following! And yes I am a long-suffering Mets fan.
Joy, I’m sorry to hear you are a Mets fan, and it’s not your fault you were born in Queens. 🙂
Welcome to the blog. Make yourself at home. We’re very nice here!
I don’t know if your into awards, but I nominated you for A real neat blog award anyway just because you are so awesome!
You are very sweet. Thank you! 🙂
Hello, I have been following your blog and like it very much. I have nominated you for the Versatile blogger award.
You can check more about it here :
I suspect you might like this. It comes in two parts. True story!
I just nominated you! (Yes you!!) for The Daydreamer Award – https://notthefirstnotthelast.wordpress.com/2015/03/09/my-submission-for-the-daydreamer-award/ (all the info is in the attached link- you are a great addition to my reader!! yup:))
You are very welcome Austin:)
I challenge you!!! LOL No but seriously I did!! 🙂
This went into my spam folder. I’ll have to check it out…
What??? I’m not spam! 😦 Tell them I’m a fellow blogger and its safe!! 🙂 LOL 🙂
I took it out of the spam folder, but I’m not sure why you ended up in there. What does WordPress know that I don’t? 😛
Perhaps I need to be formally introduced. Hello WordPress, I’m Lisa over at mamalisa4. I believe we met before. Don’t be coy with me.
Okay were good 🙂
An Award for you!
Thanks. This went into my spam folder for some reason…
lol! I’ve had that happen a LOT recently!!
What is WordPress trying to tell you??? 🙂
I know…. Making me think…!
can’t wait to see The Retirement Party!! sounds like you’ve written about my life…at least the retiring part 🙂
Well, it’s actually about my life. Justin is just a thinly veiled version of me! 🙂
hooray! can i access it somewhere online?
It hasn’t been released. i’ve got a copy of the rough cut on my laptop,but that’s it. 🙂
A screenwriter, sounds like a cool job. Thanks for visiting my site and liking my posts! 🙂
You’re welcome. I always like to check out new blogs. Thanks for visiting mine as well. 🙂
I certainly hope the Royals-Yankee thing doesn’t send you away. You are clever, funny, and fantastic to read. Thank you for stopping by my site yesterday…it led me right to you!
Have a great week, Austin!
Not at all, my dear. I look forward to bantering with you. I grew up watching the Yankees spank the Royals in the playoffs every year. 😉
Those movie trailers were great….I really want to see the first one! You did get me thinking….since I’m the worlds most horrific dater if I throw a retirement from dating party do you think people will bring me gifts???
Also, how do you transition from brooklyn to Maine??? They must think you are so odd up there lol!
I’m glad you liked them. The Retirement Party is about me, so that actor is playing me.
Bad dater,huh? Maybe we should swap stories. 🙂
Oh, I got stories….being a Nurse makes people feel comfortable telling me EVERYTHING….ask for medical advice….tell me all their medical problems….and if it’s going well I usually find some way to screw it up…..oh, and I am intensely attracted to emotionally unavailable men…that makes it even more fun!
Hmmm…I’m intrigued. 🙂
I tell you I suck at dating and you’re intrigued….hold on a minute…I have to go rewrite my online dating profile…it will be entitled- “I Really, Really Really Suck at Dating”…..they will be lining up!!!
It might be more the nurse thing. 🙂
Plus, it’s nice to know someone else sucks at it.
Yeah…some guys can’t handle the,OMG, wanna know what happened at work today”, thing lol Wimps.
and just as an experiment I AM going to change the title of my online dating profile lol!
Let me know how it goes.
Did it…I will write a blog about it in a few days lol
Okay, now I want to see more of the first trailer.
That movie is about my life, you know. The actor is playing me.
Hi Austin, I have nominated you for The Premio Dardos Award! I bet you are quivering with excitement… or perhaps you might be hitting your head against a wall repeating the phrase “Not another award, not another award!” You don’t have to accept this award, but I would love for you to pop over to my blog and come celebrate! There will be imaginary champagne, disco balls and a drumming cat! What more could one want? Hehe. I might even throw in some multi-flavoured icecream! 😀 If you’re interested, click on the link: https://insidethelifeofmoi.wordpress.com/2015/04/29/my-big-fat-award-ceremonystrike-two/
Anything I get from you makes me quiver with excitement, my dear. 🙂
Yay! I hope you join the party later. There will be champagne…and perhaps a bit of moshing… (But only if you’re lucky!)
I would love that…
Thank you. I am so honored!
You’re very welcome! 😀
you got me freakin out man
How so, Bob?
WE THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO ARREST ME!
Needless to say, you’re great, so I nominated you for the Free Style Writing Challenge. Totally up to you whether you participate. I look forward to reading what you write if you do! https://onlybadchi.wordpress.com/2015/06/01/free-style-writing-challenge-gingerbread/
Thanks! You’re pretty awesome. 🙂
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Hello Austin! I don’t know what you’ll do with this, but just stopping by to give you a shout-out as I have enjoyed your writing. In case the pingback didn’t work.Here’s for you and feel free to ignore! 🙂
A Friday pick-me-up for you- http://10yearsasinglemom.com/2015/06/26/the-creative-blogger-award/
I have just nominated you for the Creative Blogger Award!
You had a great debut and see a star on Hollywood Blvd in your future! Pleased to meet you Austin, Cher’s block party is going strong!
I nominated you for a Sunshine blogger award… check it out and participate if you wish 🙂 https://iwillnotliveinvain.wordpress.com/2015/09/28/sunshine-blogger-award/
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What happened to your post, “Will Doc Brown Endorse His Evil Twin, Bernie Sanders?” I read it via email and when I clicked Comment, I received: “Apologies, but the page you requested could not be found.” It was a great post!
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Hi Austin, I just nominated you for a Liebster Award. I love your blog!
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Merry Christmas to you and the kitties!
Not sure if this company is of any interest to you: https://losangeles.craigslist.org/sfv/wrg/d/north-hollywood-screenwriters-wanted/6803976869.html
I will check it out. Thank you, Adele. 🙂
Would you like to exchange emails so we can communicate more directly?