Author Archives: Austin

About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.

Always Happy When It Rains

Have you ever noticed that the world sucks less when it’s raining, Modern Philosophers? Before you come at me, I understand that the world around me doesn’t change in any metaphysical way when the skies open and the clouds weep.  … Continue reading

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It’s Harder To Hit A Moving Target

One of the best things about going back to my regular job, Modern Philosophers, other than hanging that Mandalorian sign on my office door, has been getting to see old friends again after almost three months. The other day, I … Continue reading

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Send In All The Clones

I’ve never been delusional enough, Modern Philosophers, to believe that the world was clamoring for multiple versions of me. One Austin might actually be too many in the opinion of some, but I’m certain no one wants that number increased. … Continue reading

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Is This Thing Still On???

Hello?  Hello??? Is this thing still on?  Can anyone hear me? How’s it going, Modern Philosophers?  Have you missed me?  Sorry to suddenly disappear from the blogosphere without warning, but life happened. There’s just been so much going on in … Continue reading

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Just Look At The Clouds

Sometimes, I just like to look at the clouds, Modern Philosophers. I find them to be very compelling.  They can be so beautiful, but also so menacing.  When a storm is on the horizon, the clouds let you know.  If … Continue reading

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Play Nice, Stay Safe, Don’t Suck

There is no disputing that we live in challenging, stressful, unsettling times, Modern Philosophers. The Coronavirus has disrupted our lives, made us fear going outside and being around others, and left us with a very uncertain future. Such a seismic … Continue reading

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Wear A Mask In Public, This Is The Way

I’ve just finished watching The Mandalorian, Modern Philosophers. Not only was it highly entertaining, but it also taught me what to say to people who refuse to wear a mask in public: This is the way. For those of you … Continue reading

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Unicorn Rainbow Ice Cream Party

Today’s post was going to be a brutally honest rant about how I’ve lost faith in the federal government and my fellow man because of their response to the Coronavirus pandemic, Modern Philosophers. Luckily, I realized that the world was … Continue reading

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A Time Machine For Mom

I have a peculiar Mother’s Day tradition, Modern Philosophers. I like to spend the day in the garage working on my time machine.  I’ve been building it for years, and not making much progress, but I always set aside time … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Love | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

The Eternal Winter Of My Discontent

When I woke up this morning, Modern Philosophers, it was snowing.  It was coming down quite hard and already sticking. At first, I was angry because it’s not supposed to snow in Maine.  The 182 Days of Terror clearly end … Continue reading

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