Category Archives: Politics

Biden’s European Apology Tour A Huge Success

Posted on June 19, 2021 by Austin

The results are in, Modern Philosophers, and President Joe Biden’s recent trip to apologize to European leaders for his predecessor’s behavior has been declared a huge success! Sure, the cover story was that President Biden was traveling to Europe for … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

The Last Ride of the Crazy Train

Posted on January 17, 2021 by Austin

Holly watched in pained amusement as Aaron gyrated in front of the bench on his side of the slushy, snowy path. If she had to guess, she would have said that her best friend thought he was dancing, but it … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Treason With A Capital Trump

Posted on January 9, 2021 by Austin

It certainly wasn’t the birthday I expected, Modern Philosophers. Of course, it turns out this might not be the country I expected it to be, either. I’m not sure what I want to write about the events that took place … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 16 Comments

Trump Adds 1700 Days to December to Delay Inauguration

Posted on November 21, 2020 by Austin

I’m no legal expert, Modern Philosophers, but I’m pretty sure that Trump’s legal team is getting desperate in their attempts to overturn the results of the 2020 Presidential Election. Not only have they been unable to prove that the dead … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 12 Comments

I See Dead Voters

Posted on November 15, 2020 by Austin

“What really bothers me about the Republicans’ claims of voter fraud is that they claim dead people voted, but they don’t give us any specifics,” Aaron complained from his bench after taking a sip of Snapple. Holly nodded in agreement … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 13 Comments

Trump Creates New States, Awards Himself Their Electoral Votes

Posted on November 14, 2020 by Austin

You’ve got to give the Trump Administration an A for creativity when it comes to finding new ways to avoid conceding the election, Modern Philosophers. In a move that not even the dead people who voted for Joe Biden in … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 14 Comments

Americans Finally Exhale As Biden Declared Winner

Posted on November 7, 2020 by Austin

After what seemed like years, Joe Biden has finally been declared the next President of the United States, Modern Philosophers! For the first time since Tuesday, I’ve been able to exhale.  I had no idea that I’d been holding my … Continue reading →

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Trump Declares Victory Over Halloween

Posted on October 31, 2020 by Austin

Just mere days after the White House website claimed that the administration had put an end to COVID-19, President Trump has taken credit for another huge accomplishment, Modern Philosophers. Now he’s declared victory over Halloween. At a campaign rally in … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

I Voted! Did It Work???

Posted on October 17, 2020 by Austin

I haven’t been this enthusiastic about voting since my Residence Hall Government Election during my Junior year of college, Modern Philosophers. Back then, I was a first time candidate running for President, and I didn’t think I had much of … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

CDC Adds Sunday Joyride to Approved Coronavirus Treatments

Posted on October 10, 2020 by Austin

Modern Philosophers, are you tired of waiting around for a Coronavirus vaccine? Are you sick of wearing a mask? Are you done letting the Coronavirus dominate you? Well, there might finally be some good news for you. According to the … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments