Tag Archives: 2016 Presidential Election

How Come I’m Not With Hillary?

As the Democratic and Republican National Conventions approach, Modern Philosophers, I must confess that I’ve followed this Presidential election much more closely than any previous race for the White House. Usually, I just wait for the field to be narrowed … Continue reading

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Trump…A Disturbance In The Force

I had a serious headache that only grew worse as the day progressed, Modern Philosophers. At first I blamed work.  It has a tendency to melt my brain, and as that organ slowly liquefies, I generally develop a nagging headache. … Continue reading

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A Nightmare on Pennsylvania Avenue

I haven’t slept much lately, Modern Philosophers, because I’ve been having the most terrifying nightmares. I wake up in a cold sweat, my heart is racing, and I’m far too frightened to go back to sleep lest I slip back … Continue reading

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Who The @#$% Do I Vote For Now?

Bernie Sanders didn’t come through last night with a huge upset victory in the California Primary, Modern Philosophers, so I woke up this morning with one question on my mind: Who the @#$% do I vote for now? I’ve been … Continue reading

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If Only Trump Would Let Me Shave His Head…

I was getting my hair cut this morning, Modern Philosophers, when the oddest Deep Thought filled my head and refused to leave. If only Donald Trump would let me shave his head, I might consider voting for him. I know, … Continue reading

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Trump Considering Negan For Secretary Of State

Just when I thought Future President Trump couldn’t possibly shock me again, Modern Philosophers, he totally blew my mind. In a press conference held outside of Trump Tower, the Belligerent Billionaire announced that he has made a choice for Secretary … Continue reading

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Trump Vows To Sell Wisconsin To Canada

After taking a solid beating from Ted Cruz in yesterday’s Wisconsin Republican Primary, Future President Donald Trump vowed to get his revenge on the people who did not vote for him. “When I’m President, I’m going to sell Wisconsin to … Continue reading

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America Needs A Loving Grandpa

I was giving it some Deep Thought tonight, Modern Philosophers, and America is like one huge family. We don’t always get along, but we’ve got that same patriotic blood running through our veins, and we love our home sweet home. … Continue reading

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America Stops Looking For Marco (Polo!)

The American electorate has finally decided to get out of the pool, Modern Philosophers. Alas, our boring game of Marco (Polo!) has come to a merciful end.  A month and a half after his epic third place finish in the … Continue reading

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Is Trump The Zombie King?

I’m getting ready to watch The Walking Dead, Modern Philosophers, so I’ve definitely got zombies on my mind, but I think I’m on to something. Does the popularity of The Walking Dead explain why Donald Trump is doing so well … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Philosophy, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 13 Comments