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Tag Archives: afterlife
God Electrifies The Pearly Gates To Keep Out Zombies
Originally posted on The Return of the Modern Philosopher:
Apparently, Zombies don’t get to go to Heaven, Modern Philosophers. The Vatican announced today that God had electrified the Pearly Gates in order to keep out the herds of Zombies that…
Posted in Humor, Philosophy
Tagged afterlife, God, heaven, Humor, Modern Philosopher, Religion, Sarcasm, satire, Zombie Apocalypse, Zombies
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The Devil Offers A Warm Place In Hell For Anyone Tired Of Winter
“I demand equal time!” snarled the angry voice from somewhere in the darkness. It is never enjoyable to be awakened from a deep sleep, Modern Philosophers, but it sucks even more when the disturbance is caused by The Prince of … Continue reading
Posted in Humor, Philosophy
Tagged afterlife, equal time, hell, Humor, Modern Philosopher, North Pole, Santa Claus, Sarcasm, satire, The Devil
16 Comments
Stairway to Heaven Closed for Repairs; Highway to Hell Adding Lanes
Apparently, you can’t avoid construction delays in the Afterlife, whether you’ve been naughty or nice. The Modern Philosopher Traffic Chopper reports delays on both the Stairway to Heaven and the Highway to Hell, news that holiday travelers most certainly did … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged afterlife, Comedy, construction work, delays, heaven, hell, highway to hell, holiday traffic, Humor, Modern Philosopher, satire, stairway to heaven
38 Comments