Tag Archives: Bernie Sanders

Republicans Oppose Cupid’s Plan For Universal Love

Posted on February 9, 2019 by Austin

Apparently, President Trump and the Republican Party do not believe that everyone deserves to have a happy Valentine’s Day, Modern Philosophers. The Republicans today vowed to shoot down Cupid’s proposed plan for Universal Love. According to the plan set forth … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Love, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 18 Comments

Maine Witches Refuse To Endorse “Black Magic” Hillary

Posted on October 10, 2016 by Austin

Halloween Season is in full swing in Maine, Modern Philosophers, but even the celebration of every Otherworldly Being’s favorite holiday has to pause to allow some time for the 2016 Presidential Election. This morning, during a secret meeting held at … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

How Come I’m Not With Hillary?

Posted on July 1, 2016 by Austin

As the Democratic and Republican National Conventions approach, Modern Philosophers, I must confess that I’ve followed this Presidential election much more closely than any previous race for the White House. Usually, I just wait for the field to be narrowed … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 13 Comments

Would Trump Strike Down Obi Wan?

Posted on June 11, 2016 by Austin

Earlier this week, Modern Philosophers, I generated a huge number of Deep Thoughts after I posed the question: “Who the @#$% do I vote for now?” That, of course, was triggered by Bernie Sanders’ failure to win the California Primary … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Who The @#$% Do I Vote For Now?

Posted on June 8, 2016 by Austin

Bernie Sanders didn’t come through last night with a huge upset victory in the California Primary, Modern Philosophers, so I woke up this morning with one question on my mind: Who the @#$% do I vote for now? I’ve been … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 27 Comments

If Only Trump Would Let Me Shave His Head…

Posted on April 23, 2016 by Austin

I was getting my hair cut this morning, Modern Philosophers, when the oddest Deep Thought filled my head and refused to leave. If only Donald Trump would let me shave his head, I might consider voting for him. I know, … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 18 Comments

Trump Vows To Sell Wisconsin To Canada

Posted on April 6, 2016 by Austin

After taking a solid beating from Ted Cruz in yesterday’s Wisconsin Republican Primary, Future President Donald Trump vowed to get his revenge on the people who did not vote for him. “When I’m President, I’m going to sell Wisconsin to … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 19 Comments

America Needs A Loving Grandpa

Posted on March 30, 2016 by Austin

I was giving it some Deep Thought tonight, Modern Philosophers, and America is like one huge family. We don’t always get along, but we’ve got that same patriotic blood running through our veins, and we love our home sweet home. … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 25 Comments

Is Trump The Zombie King?

Posted on March 14, 2016 by Austin

I’m getting ready to watch The Walking Dead, Modern Philosophers, so I’ve definitely got zombies on my mind, but I think I’m on to something. Does the popularity of The Walking Dead explain why Donald Trump is doing so well … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 13 Comments

Sanders Makes Pollsters Feel The Bern!

Posted on March 9, 2016 by Austin

Feel the Bern! I hope and pray, Modern Philosophers, that Bernie Sanders was thinking those three words last night as he watched the results of the Michigan Democratic Primary slowly roll in over the course of the evening. Sanders pulled … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 14 Comments