Tag Archives: CDC

CDC Names “I’ll Be Home For Christmas” Its Official Holiday Song

In an attempt to make their announcements sound less like harbingers of impending doom, the CDC today shared that it has selected an official song for the 2020 Holiday Season, Modern Philosophers. “I’ll Be Home For Christmas” will have the … Continue reading

Posted in Christmas, Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

CDC Adds Sunday Joyride to Approved Coronavirus Treatments

Modern Philosophers, are you tired of waiting around for a Coronavirus vaccine? Are you sick of wearing a mask? Are you done letting the Coronavirus dominate you? Well, there might finally be some good news for you. According to the … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

North Pole Denies Closings Are Due To Ebola Scare

Despite what you might have heard, Modern Philosophers, there is no Ebola scare at The North Pole. While it is true that The North Pole Police Department has closed all entry points to Santa’s home, the Ebola rumors rocketing around … Continue reading

Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 20 Comments