Tag Archives: depression

Trump Is Leading Cause Of Depression In Americans

According to a new report, President Trump is now the leading cause of depression in Americans, Modern Philosophers The study, released by the Department Utilizing Statistics and Tables (DUST), revealed that Trump caused depression in more Americans than the next … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 20 Comments

What’s Really Going On Behind Your Smile?

Look at that charming smile on the left, Modern Philosophers.  Not bad, right? People always tell me I should show my teeth more, but I find that if I smile too wide, it makes me squint and I look sleepy … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 32 Comments

Not Tonight, My Dear

“We aren’t you writing?” The Muse asked nervously as she glided into the room, her beautiful face masked with worry over the sight of me without my trusty laptop. “I don’t think I’m going to do that tonight,” I replied … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Love, Philosophy, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 30 Comments

You’re A Mean One, Mr Grinch!

While I like to believe I’m the smartest person I know, Modern Philosophers, even I don’t know the answer to everything. Like how do I tell the woman I love that the dark clouds have returned, and I just don’t … Continue reading

Posted in Christmas, Holidays, Humor, Love, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 33 Comments

Popular Prescription: Patriotic Porch Pie

Doctors are so quick these days, Modern Philosophers, to write out a prescription for a magic pill that can cure whatever ails you. I am big supporter of Magic, but the kind conjured up by Witches, not dispensed in tablet … Continue reading

Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 30 Comments

“Smart” Ice Cream Offers Faster Fix For Sadness And Broken Hearts

The next time life has you down, Modern Philosophers, and you reach for that quart of ice cream to make it all better, expect much quicker results! Scientists at Maine’s prestigious Chamberlain Laboratories have created a Smart Ice Cream, which … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Love, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 59 Comments

I Advise You To Find A Very Large Umbrella

Dear Modern Philosopher, What do you do when the dark clouds won’t go away? Drowning in Darkness   Dear Drowning, As you know, I have often been trailed by the dark clouds, but I always manage to give them the … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Love, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 32 Comments

Sometimes You’ve Just Got To Outrun That Funk!

I decided it was time to take some drastic action to shake myself out of this near paralyzing funk of depression and sadness, Modern Philosophers. I pulled my running toga out of storage, laced up my Monkey Boy running shoes, … Continue reading

Posted in Fitness, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 13 Comments

Jolly Green Giant Admitted to Maine Hospital for Treatment of Depression

Bangor’s Acadia Hospital is a long way from the valley in which he’s accustomed to roaming, but the Jolly Green Giant claims he feels right at home at the Maine mental health facility.  Admitted last week for treatment of his … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , | 18 Comments