Tag Archives: Elves

Sessions Wouldn’t Use Elfin Magic To Stop The Caravan

Posted on November 10, 2018 by Austin

President Trump’s reason for firing fun size Attorney General Jeff Session is becoming a little clearer, Modern Philosophers. My source inside the White House informs me that the original theory floating around the internet is a complete fabrication. “President Trump … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

Star Wars Fever Severely Disrupts North Pole Toy Production

Posted on December 16, 2015 by Austin

A long time ago, at a workshop far, far away… Santa’s Elves were hard at work making the toys that good little girls and boys all over the world will be receiving on Christmas. That was, until Star Wars Fever … Continue reading →

Posted in Christmas, Holidays, Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Mrs. Claus Working To Improve Elf Literacy

Posted on December 11, 2014 by Austin

The House on the Hill welcomed a special guest from The North Pole today, Modern Philosophers. Mrs. Claus surprised me with a Writer’s Day visit, and I couldn’t have been more thrilled. “I knew from reading your blog that you … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

North Pole Denies Closings Are Due To Ebola Scare

Posted on December 1, 2014 by Austin

Despite what you might have heard, Modern Philosophers, there is no Ebola scare at The North Pole. While it is true that The North Pole Police Department has closed all entry points to Santa’s home, the Ebola rumors rocketing around … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 20 Comments

Wednesday Morning Eggnog Club: Merry Christmas!

Posted on December 25, 2013 by Austin

Merry Christmas, Modern Philosophers! A Hump Day Christmas is supposed to mean a year of good luck for the camels in your life, so I’m guessing those of you who own a camel are pretty excited. Just wanted to take … Continue reading →

Posted in Christmas, Holidays, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Several Of Santa’s Elves Arrested For Selling Spots On The Nice List

Posted on December 1, 2013 by Austin

As the calendar turns to December, it looks like scandal has rocked the North Pole, Modern Philosophers. My sources at Santa’s Village tell me that North Pole Police raided Santa’s Workshop just after 9:00AM, and arrested several Elves, who have … Continue reading →

Posted in Christmas, Holidays, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 43 Comments

Elf Growth Spurt Jeopardizes North Pole Toy Production

Posted on December 7, 2012 by Austin

It must be something in the water, Modern Philosophers. That’s the only theory North Pole Scientists have been able to come up with to explain the bizarre growth spurt that has affected the Elf population in Santa’s Village over the … Continue reading →

Posted in Christmas, Holidays, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 20 Comments