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© Austin Hodgens and The Return of the Modern Philosopher, 2012-2019. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Austin Hodgens and The Return of the Modern Philosopher with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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Tag Archives: finances
Maybe Cupid Cares About Your Budget
Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, Modern Philosophers. I belong to a support group called Why Does Cupid Hate Us?, which is for people who have issues about being single. Not everyone in the group is angry or bitter, but around … Continue reading
Posted in Dating, Humor, Love
Tagged Cupid, dating, finances, Humor, Love, Modern Philosopher, money, sarcasm, satire, single life, Valentines' Day
5 Comments
Use More Water, Ya Weirdo!
I’m well aware that I’m supposed to drink a lot of water when I’m running and working out, Modern Philosophers, and I think I do an excellent job of that. However, my town has an issue with it. So much … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged conservation, finances, Humor, Life in Maine, Modern Philosopher, sarcasm, satire, single life, the joys of owning a home, water, water bill
8 Comments
How I Would Spend My Trump Hush Money
I’ve given it a great deal of Deep Thought, Modern Philosophers, and I am finally ready to answer the question so many of you have asked me. While $130,000 might be just a drop in the bucket to a supposed … Continue reading
Posted in Humor, Politics
Tagged Donald Trump, finances, Humor, hush money, Michael Cohen, Modern Philosopher, Politics, sarcasm, satire, Stormy Daniels, wish list
7 Comments
Sleep, You Glorious Bastard!
I didn’t roll out of bed until 8:45 this morning, Modern Philosophers. And it was simply glorious. With all the overtime I’ve put in lately, this is the latest I’ve slept in ages. To give you a little perspective, on … Continue reading
Posted in Humor, Philosophy
Tagged finances, Humor, life, Modern Philosopher, money, overtime, sarcasm, satire, sleep, work
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I Want My $300!
I hear the same questions from my coworkers every morning, Modern Philosophers, as they pass my desk on their way to clock in for the day… Did you sleep here last night? When’s the last time you’ve been home? Are … Continue reading
Posted in Humor, Philosophy
Tagged Better Off Dead, finances, Humor, John Cusack, Modern Philosopher, money, MTV, NYU, sarcasm, satire, work
14 Comments
