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© Austin Hodgens and The Return of the Modern Philosopher, 2012-2017. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Austin Hodgens and The Return of the Modern Philosopher with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.Meta
Tag Archives: Flying monkeys
Do Monkeys Fear Monkey Bread?
Tonight’s edition of After Dinner Mints, Modern Philosophers, is brought to you by a question that has been nagging at me over the past few weeks… Do monkeys fear monkey bread? One of my coworkers makes an awesome loaf (Is … Continue reading →
Posted in Humor, Philosophy
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Tagged After Dinner Mints, Flying monkeys, food, Humor, Modern Philosopher, monkey bread, Philosophy, Planet of the Apes, sarcasm, satire, side effects of dieting
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29 Comments
The Attack Of The Flying Monkey Boy
I need to establish, right from the very beginning, Modern Philosophers, that I rarely frequent Monkey Bars. They smell horrible (even more so in the Summer), the Flying Monkeys who frequent them are quite rowdy once they’ve had a few … Continue reading →
Posted in Fitness, Humor, Philosophy, Writing
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Tagged banana daiquiris, fiction, Flying monkeys, Humor, Modern Philosopher, monkey bars, running, Sarcasm, satire, short story, Summer
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2 Comments
Maine’s Flying Monkeys Grounded Due To High Winds
Maine Governor Paul LePage has issued an order grounding all of Maine’s Flying Monkeys due to strong winds, Modern Philosophers. Maine’s Air National Guard has been mobilized to clear the skies, and all Flying Monkeys are being issued free drink … Continue reading →
Posted in Humor, Philosophy
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Tagged Flying monkeys, Governor LePage, high winds, Humor, Maine, Modern Philosopher, Oz, Sarcasm, satire, Wicked Witch of the West, Wizard of Oz
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12 Comments
Hanukkah Harry Hints At Getting His Own Sleigh
Originally posted on The Return of the Modern Philosopher:
As I broke on this blog earlier in the week, Modern Philosophers, Hanukkah Harry rode along with Santa Claus this year as Flying Monkeys provided a security escort. Santa and his…
Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy
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Tagged Christmas, Flying monkeys, Hanukkah, Hanukkah Harry, holiday solidarity, Humor, Modern Philosopher, Santa Claus, Sarcasm, satire
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1 Comment
Flying Monkeys To Escort Santa’s Sleigh Due to Growing Security Concerns
Originally posted on The Return of the Modern Philosopher:
General Phineas “Woody” Appleton, Commander in Chief of the North Pole Security Agency, announced today that because of growing security concerns, Santa’s sleigh will be escorted around the world by a…
Posted in Christmas, Holidays, Humor, Philosophy
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Tagged Christmas, Flying monkeys, Humor, Modern Philosopher, North Pole, Santa Claus, Sarcasm, satire, terrorism
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Halloween Flights Of Fancy
It turned out to be one of “those Mondays”, Modern Philosophers, so when I got home to The House on the Hill after a horrible day at work, I knew needed a quick pick me up to raise my spirits. … Continue reading →
Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy
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Tagged broomsticks, Flying monkeys, Gargoyles, Halloween, Humor, Modern Philosopher, Monday, Sarcasm, satire, Witches
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10 Comments
Run Like You Know The Rain Is Coming, My Pretty
Sometimes, I don’t need much motivation to throw on the Running Toga, lace up my sneakers, and head out for my morning run, Modern Philosophers. This was one such morning. I saw the rain clouds slowly moving in, and could … Continue reading →
Posted in Fitness, Humor, Philosophy
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Tagged Flying monkeys, Humor, Modern Philosopher, rain, running, Sarcasm, satire, The Wizard of Oz, Wicked Witch
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25 Comments
