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© Austin Hodgens and The Return of the Modern Philosopher, 2012-2023. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Austin Hodgens and The Return of the Modern Philosopher with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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Tag Archives: Hogwarts
Her Majesty’s Modern Philosopher
I am thrilled to announce, Modern Philosophers, that I have accepted Queen Elizabeth’s invitation to fill one of the vacancies in the Royal Family. While I’m sorry to see Harry and Meghan leave for greener pastures in Canada, I am … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged Harry and Meghan, Hogwarts, Humor, Meghan Markle, Modern Philosopher, Prince Harry, Queen Elizabeth, Royal Family, sarcasm, satire
10 Comments
The Bling Ring Of Hell
“This is why they shouldn’t skip a week between the Conference Championships and the Super Bowl,” The Devil grumbled as I shut off the television. “Without football, we are forced to watch movies like that!” I rolled my eyes because … Continue reading
Posted in Humor, Philosophy, Writing
Tagged Emma Watson, Hermione Granger, Hogwarts, Humor, Magic, Modern Philosopher, sarcasm, satire, short story, The Bling Ring, The Devil
13 Comments
Brewer High School To Host Two Exchange Students From Hogwarts This Fall
Brewer High School, which is located not far from The House on the Hill, announced today that it will be hosting two foreign exchange students from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry for the Fall Semester. The school, whose athletic … Continue reading
Posted in Humor, Philosophy
Tagged Brewer High School, exchange students, Harry Potter, Hogwarts, Humor, Modern Philosopher, Sarcasm, satire, Witches, Wizards
5 Comments
Harry Potter To Help Bangor PD Battle Bath Salts Users
This Modern Philosopher is delighted to announce that Harry Potter has found a new adventure right here in Maine. “Harry Potter & The Crazed Bath Salts Users” might not be the catchiest title, but don’t even try to tell me … Continue reading
Posted in Humor, Philosophy
Tagged Bangor PD, bath salts, Books, crime, Harry Potter, Hogwarts, Humor, Magic, Modern Philosopher, satire, wands
20 Comments
Maine’s First School Of Magic Now Closer To Being A Reality
Maine Governor Paul LePage, who has long said he would do everything in his power to prevent a School of Magic from opening in the state, has made an abrupt about face and is ready to support the idea. LePage’s … Continue reading
Posted in Humor, Philosophy
Tagged Harry Potter, Hogwarts, Humor, Magic, Modern Philosopher, satire, Witches, Wizards
20 Comments
Hogwarts, Having Fallen on Hard Times, To Admit Rich Muggles Who Can Do Card Tricks
Oh, how the mighty have fallen, Modern Philosophers. Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry has faced very difficult times ever since a series of scandals, murders, and mysterious disappearances rocked the famed British school of magic. Not only is attendance … Continue reading
Posted in Humor, Philosophy
Tagged education, Harry Potter, Hogwarts, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardy, Humor, Magic, Modern Philosopher, Muggles, satire, tuition, witchcraft
62 Comments