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© Austin Hodgens and The Return of the Modern Philosopher, 2012-2019. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Austin Hodgens and The Return of the Modern Philosopher with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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Tag Archives: Holidays
Rescuers Call Off Search For Missing Thanksgiving Leftovers
Sunday, Day 4 I can’t believe this is happening! I’ve searched everywhere, but they’re gone. Completely vanished. As if they weren’t even here in the first place! I’ve torn apart the refrigerator. I didn’t even know the thing had a … Continue reading
Posted in Holidays, Humor
Tagged food, Holidays, Humor, life, Modern Philosopher, sarcasm, satire, Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving leftovers
12 Comments
And Then I Put On My Sweatpants…
Thanksgiving is a bit anticlimactic, don’t you agree, Modern Philosophers? The entire day builds up to this enormous feast, but once you’re done eating, it feels just like any other meal. You’re full, a bit bloated, maybe you burp a … Continue reading
Posted in Holidays, Humor
Tagged Christmas, Happy Thanksgiving, holiday blues, Holidays, Humor, life, Modern Philosopher, sarcasm, satire, Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving dinner
4 Comments
Trump Declares That Every Day Is Now President’s Day
Happy Presidents Day, Modern Philosophers. In case you forgot about the holiday, don’t worry. It will be coming around again much sooner than usual. As in tomorrow. President Trump signed a new Executive Order today declaring that every day is … Continue reading
What Would Christmas Want From Us?
It’s the first Friday night of December, Modern Philosophers, which means we are crawling ever closer to the first day of Spring! Yes, I’m taking this being positive thing very seriously if I can see December 2 as being anywhere … Continue reading
Posted in Christmas, Humor, Philosophy
Tagged Christmas, christmas lights, Christmas spirit, Frankenstein Christmas commercial, Holidays, Humor, Modern Philosopher, Philosophy, sarcasm, satire, think tank
8 Comments
I Am…
sad. alone. confused. brokenhearted. doubting myself. wondering how this happened. wishing that someone would just understand. crying. unable to sleep. talking to myself. dreaming about her constantly. afraid of spending the rest of my life alone. incapable of getting anyone … Continue reading
Posted in Love, Philosophy, Poetry
Tagged alone, Broken Heart, coping, Holidays, life, loneliness, Love, Modern Philosopher, poem, Relationships, sadness
40 Comments
The Feast Of The Big Sandwich
Originally posted on The Return of the Modern Philosopher:
Happy Feast of the Big Sandwich, Modern Philosophers! As I mentioned in my Monday Morning Coffee Club post, this is an actual holiday I made up when I lived in California.…
Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy
Tagged big sandwich, California, Holidays, Humor, life, sarcasm, Thanksgiving, traditions
4 Comments
Monday Morning Coffee Club: 11/2/15
Can you believe it’s already November, Modern Philosophers? That means that Halloween Season has officially ended, and all the Otherworldly Beings who spent the month vacationing and celebrating the holiday in Maine have left to go back to their normal … Continue reading
Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy
Tagged blog birthday, blogging, coffee, Holidays, Humor, life, Modern Philosopher, Monday, November, Sarcasm, satire
9 Comments
