Tag Archives: Horror Movies

A Nightmare on Pennsylvania Avenue

I haven’t slept much lately, Modern Philosophers, because I’ve been having the most terrifying nightmares. I wake up in a cold sweat, my heart is racing, and I’m far too frightened to go back to sleep lest I slip back … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

How To Tell If Your Date Is A Horror Movie Survivor

The interns tell me I’m long overdue for a new Dating Tips post, Modern Philosophers.  Since I love being told to do by well educated twentysomethings, I decided to get right on that. Dating can be very scary, and like … Continue reading

Posted in Dating, Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Jason Voorhees Endorses Donald Trump

On a beautiful Friday the 13th, at a press conference held at scenic Camp Crystal Lake, seemingly immortal serial killer, movie star, and goalie mask enthusiast Jason Voorhees endorsed Donald Trump for President. “I believe that Mr. Trump can make … Continue reading

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Freddy Krueger Admitted To Sleep Lab To Treat Extreme Insomnia

Freddy Krueger, a local custodian and occasional sweater model, was admitted to St. Joseph’s Sleep Lab in Bangor for treatment of extreme insomnia. According to Dr. Rypp Vanwinckel, the head of the hospital’s Sleep Studies Department, Mr. Krueger’s insomnia was … Continue reading

Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

There’s Something In The Fog…

I loved watching horror movies when I was a kid, Modern Philosophers.  I’d rent them or catch them on TV since I was too young to see them in the theater, and I’d laugh when I was supposed to be … Continue reading

Posted in Fitness, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 16 Comments

I Scream, You Scream…

If I were Walking down The street, And I saw Someone in a Ghostface mask Coming towards me, I’d run. Of course, The horror movie Fan in me Would want To know What the hell Was going on, But I’d … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Philosophy, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Win A Camping Weekend With Jason Voorhees!

Happy Friday the 13th, Modern Philosophers! As you know, I write movies in my spare time, with thrillers and horrors stories being my specialty.   I grew up loving the horror classics: Halloween, The Fog, A Nightmare On Elm Street, … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 45 Comments

Bite Me! The Benefit For Werewolf Awareness In Maine

Bite Me!, the benefit to help save Maine’s Werewolf population, is really starting to take shape.  Organizers plan to hold the event at the Bangor Waterfront, home to the Summer Concert Series, in the days leading up to May’s full … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

MOVIE REVIEW: Good Friday the 13th: Judas Lives!

It wouldn’t truly be the Easter Season without the release of the next film in the Good Friday the 13th horror franchise.  As always, the story follows hockey mask wearing, machete wielding serial killer, Judas Iscariot, the former Apostle who … Continue reading

Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 25 Comments

Bride Of Frankenstein Files For Divorce; Wants Her Own Name & A New Hairstyle

The Bride of Frankenstein today filed for divorce from her long time husband, Frankenstein’s Monster, citing irreconcilable differences.  The couple has been estranged since Valentine’s Day, and the Bride has kept a low profile at the their Kennebunkport estate since … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Love, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 29 Comments