Tag Archives: McDonald’s

The Divorce Dating Dilemma

Posted on May 28, 2015 by Austin

“I’m pretty sure my divorce lawyer is into me,” Eric announced out of the blue as he opened the carton on his tray and stared at the Big Mac contained within. Eric’s soon to be ex-wife had banned fast food … Continue reading →

Posted in Dating, Humor, Love, Philosophy, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

McDonald’s Embraces Its Heritage With New Irish Menu

Posted on April 20, 2015 by Austin

McDonald’s stunned this Fast Food Nation today, Modern Philosophers, when the company announced it was completely changing its menu. Citing a desire to embrace its heritage, while also differentiating itself from the growing number of fast food burger chains across … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 27 Comments

McDonald’s To Remodel Maine Locations To Accommodate Giants

Posted on June 22, 2013 by Austin

Mayor McCheese has made it clear that he plans on courting the Otherworldly Beings vote in the upcoming Maine Gubernatorial Election.  Today, this Modern Philosopher was invited to a meeting with the candidate and Zeus, his Campaign Manager and Father … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , | 14 Comments

The McWhopper, Burger King’s Green St Paddy’s Day Burger, Leads To Health Department Raid

Posted on March 17, 2013 by Austin

Burger King, tired of watching McDonald’s cash in every St Patrick’s Day with its Shamrock Shakes, decided to offer a special menu item for the holiday at its locations in Maine.  The McWhopper, which was just the chain’s famous burger … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , | 23 Comments

Mayor McCheese to Run for Governor of Maine; Incumbent Vows to Eat Him Alive

Posted on January 26, 2013 by Austin

In a move that stunned political pundits throughout the state, Mayor McCheese today announced his intention to seek the Democratic nomination in the 2014 Maine Gubernatorial Election. Incumbent Governor Paul LePage, whose approval ratings are almost as low as the … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 20 Comments

Hamburglar Arrested On Parole Violation After Hanging Out With Mayor McCheese

Posted on January 24, 2013 by Austin

The carousel of celebrity scandal continued to turn today when Hamburglar, Ronald McDonald’s masked friend with the shady past and penchant for the clown’s famous burgers, was arrested at the Bangor Mall after exiting Yankee Candle. It was a slow … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 19 Comments