Tag Archives: Modern Philosophers

America Stops Looking For Marco (Polo!)

Posted on March 16, 2016 by Austin

The American electorate has finally decided to get out of the pool, Modern Philosophers. Alas, our boring game of Marco (Polo!) has come to a merciful end.  A month and a half after his epic third place finish in the … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

The Grinch Says 8 Days Of Hanukkah Are Just Too Tempting

Posted on December 7, 2014 by Austin

Please keep an old friend in your thoughts and prayers this Holiday Season, Modern Philosophers. It turns out that The Grinch, that big, ugly, green, furry being with a compulsion for breaking and entering, has relapsed. According to reps for … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

Maine’s Enchanted Halloween Candy Is Actually Good For You!

Posted on October 22, 2014 by Austin

The big announcement on Day 22 of the Maine Halloween Season Festival was that the Halloween candy revelers have been eating all month is actually good for them! That’s right, Modern Philosophers, not only is the candy that’s been passed … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Friday the 13th Prequel, Thursday the 12th, To Focus On Wacky Camp Hijinks

Posted on June 12, 2014 by Austin

Just as the Summer Movie Season is about the kick into high gear, upstart studio Reboot Pictures has announced that it has given the green light to its first project. The company has purchased the prequel rights to the popular … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Starbucks Pulls Thanksgiving Coffees After Multiple Complaints

Posted on November 22, 2013 by Austin

Coffee giant Starbucks decided to pull its two new seasonal coffees after receiving numerous complaints about the items. “We thought it would be fun to come up with special Holiday offerings for our customers at Thanksgiving,” Starbucks spokesman Dirk Benedict … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 42 Comments

President Obama Announces New Anti-Racism Initiative: “Time To Repaint The White House!”

Posted on March 5, 2013 by Austin

President Obama stunned the White House Press Corps today when he made a surprise announcement about his new idea for fighting racism.  “As you know, I have already made amazing strides against racism in our country by becoming the first … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy, Politics | Tagged , , , , , | 51 Comments

Jeff Probst Re-Tweeted My Fake Survivor Post!

Posted on February 19, 2013 by Austin

I was trying to figure out why my blog was suddenly getting so many hits from Twitter.  Just as The Girl Who Tweets figured out the answer, Bev Vincent posted this on the comment section for the Survivor: Maine post…Yes, … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , | 64 Comments

King & Queen of Hearts Renew Their Wedding Vows; Queen of Clubs Suspiciously Absent

Posted on February 14, 2013 by Austin

In a touching ceremony befitting both royalty and Valentine’s Day, The King & Queen of Hearts renewed their marriage vows today at Briarcliffe Abbey in Rockland, Maine.  The ceremony was presided over by Cardinal Hoyle, who first married the couple when … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays, Humor, Love, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , | 35 Comments

Tuesday, Having Long Been Tormented For Its Heftiness, Gets Its Annual Day In The Sun

Posted on February 12, 2013 by Austin

Tomorrow is Ash Wednesday, which marks the beginning of Lent.  That means that today is Mardi Gras aka Fat Tuesday.  This is the one day out of 365 (366 if it’s a leap year) that Tuesday gets a little respect … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , | 14 Comments

8, Tired of Looking Like a Snowman, Petitions for Plastic Surgery

Posted on February 10, 2013 by Austin

Some interesting news from the World of Numbers…8 aka Eight, today appeared before the Number Line and officially petitioned for a new look. While it is a highly unusual move, seeing as how numbers are iconic figures that have been … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , | 43 Comments