Tag Archives: nightmares

Richard Belzer: Dream Warrior

Richard Belzer is vying to become my personal Freddy Krueger, Modern Philosophers! You know him.  His best known role is that of Detective John Munch, a character he played on both Homicide: Life on the Street and Law & Order: … Continue reading

Posted in Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

A Nightmare on Pennsylvania Avenue

I haven’t slept much lately, Modern Philosophers, because I’ve been having the most terrifying nightmares. I wake up in a cold sweat, my heart is racing, and I’m far too frightened to go back to sleep lest I slip back … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Welcome To The Hotel Krueger

Welcome to the Hotel Krueger, Modern Philosophers. You can check in once you’ve fallen sleep.  Check out time?  In your dreams, of course. Don’t forget to tip the bellman.  It’s not our blogger buddy The Hook, but rather, the scary … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Love, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 19 Comments

Are You On A First Date Or Just Having A Nightmare?

Memorial Day has come and gone, which means we are now in the middle of prime dating season, Modern Philosophers. I can’t just send you out into the dating world unprepared and confused, so it’s time for another dating tips … Continue reading

Posted in Dating, Humor, Love, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 23 Comments

I Had The Wrong Dream Again Last Night…

I had the wrong dream again last night, Modern Philosophers. This isn’t the first time this has happened, and it’s actually happening with alarming frequency lately. I dreamed that I was with my ex-wife.  J brought me out to a … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Love, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 25 Comments

I’m Dreaming Of A Zombie Christmas

I’m dreaming Of a Zombie Christmas, And not sleeping well, Which blows. When I close my eyes, I can only hear Hungry Zombies Trudging through the snow. I’m dreaming Of a Zombie Christmas Haunted by nightmares Bloody and gray, They … Continue reading

Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 18 Comments

If You Dream About Moving To Canada, Is It Really Actually A Nightmare?

I know that some of you are Canadian, Modern Philosophers, so I thought it was finally time to cater to that demographic of my readership. Last night, I had a very vivid dream that I had moved to Canada.  I … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 70 Comments

Halloween Horror Panel Selects Humans As Scariest Beings

The much anticipated Halloween Horror Panel was held at the Cross Insurance Center in Bangor today. A packed house gathered for what is referred to as the “Comic-Con of Halloween”.  Sponsored by the All Hallows Society, the Horror Panel is … Continue reading

Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 18 Comments

Freddy Krueger Admitted To Sleep Lab To Treat Extreme Insomnia

Freddy Krueger, a local custodian and occasional sweater model, was admitted to St. Joseph’s Sleep Lab in Bangor for treatment of extreme insomnia. According to Dr. Rypp Vanwinckel, the head of the hospital’s Sleep Studies Department, Mr. Krueger’s insomnia was … Continue reading

Posted in Holidays, Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

In Dreams, I Run From You…

Have you ever had a nightmare so upsetting, Modern Philosophers, that it wakes you up completely from a dead sleep? This happened to me at 5:07AM.  The dream shook me up so badly that going back to sleep was not … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Love, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 25 Comments