Tag Archives: President Trump

Trump Orders Jedi Arrested As States Merge Into Districts

Lately, Modern Philosophers, I feel like I’m living in the chaotic days before the cataclysmic events that lead to the birth of the dystopian societies in so many of the movies and books that I enjoy. I try to avoid … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

It’s An Honor Just To Tell You I’ve Been Nominated

Just when I was starting to think that this blog would never bring me fame and fortune, I got the call, Modern Philosophers. Actually, it was an email, this being the age of social media and all. It was from … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 36 Comments

Trump Taps Burgermeister Meisterburger As His New Chief Of Staff

Despite the rumors that no one wanted the job, President Trump wasted very little time finding a replacement for outgoing Chief of Staff John Kelly, Modern Philosophers. According to a typo-riddled tweet sent in the wee hours of the morning, … Continue reading

Posted in Christmas, Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

The Highly Anticipated Return of the Sunday Rejects

It’s been a long time, Modern Philosophers, since I’ve shared some of my monologue jokes with you. Now that we’ve survived Election Day, I thought we might celebrate by welcoming the Sunday Rejects back to the blog. As you know, … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 13 Comments

The Devil Declines

President Trump: Thank you for your invitation to join you for Sunday Brunch at Mar-a-Lago, but I must respectfully decline due to a standing Sunday appointment that cannot be broken. While a well prepared meal at your favorite weekend getaway … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Politics, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 23 Comments

St Patrick Vows To Drive Snakes Out Of The White House

Forever poised to keep both Irish and American eyes smiling on the holiday that bears his name, St. Patrick held a press conference today outside of the NYC cathedral named after him to make a huge announcement, Modern Philosophers. “It … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 15 Comments

How Does Trump’s Travel Ban Affect Leprechauns?

St. Patrick’s Day is quickly approaching, Modern Philosophers, and the question on the mind of most Americans is:  How does Trump’s travel ban affect Leprechauns? Let’s face it…it’s not really St. Patrick’s Day if Leprechauns aren’t running wild through the … Continue reading

Posted in Holidays, Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 20 Comments

Ghosts Refuse To Haunt Trump White House

More strange news from the White House, Modern Philosophers.  It was revealed today that the ghosts that have haunted the building for over two centuries refuse to go anywhere near it now that President Trump has taken up residence. According … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 14 Comments

Aliens Visiting Earth Less Since Trump’s Inauguration

The Department Utilizing Statistics and Tables (DUST) announced today, Modern Philosophers, that Alien visits to Earth have dropped dramatically since President Trump’s Inauguration. While DUST is not willing to state outright that Trump’s approval rating with Aliens is the lowest … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 16 Comments

Trump Declares That Every Day Is Now President’s Day

Happy Presidents Day, Modern Philosophers. In case you forgot about the holiday, don’t worry.  It will be coming around again much sooner than usual. As in tomorrow. President Trump signed a new Executive Order today declaring that every day is … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 16 Comments