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© Austin Hodgens and The Return of the Modern Philosopher, 2012-2023. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Austin Hodgens and The Return of the Modern Philosopher with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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Tag Archives: sarcasm
Interleague Play
Aaron and Holly sat on their usual bench overlooking the Penobscot River. It was a gorgeous summer day, and the ducks were out for a morning swim. Holly sipped her coffee and smiled at the ducks, while Aaron sat in … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged best friends, dating, flash fiction, Humor, Modern Philosopher, sarcasm, satire, short story
6 Comments
The Freedom To Celebrate In Silence
“I’m so excited that I was able to convince you to join me for our Sunday walk and chat today!” Holly gushed. “It’s an Independence Day miracle!” Aaron chuckled at her enthusiasm and then sipped his Snapple. “It’s hard to … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged Fourth of July, Humor, Independence Day, Modern Philosopher, Relationships, sarcasm, satire, short story
7 Comments
Why I Hate This Holiday
I’m really starting to hate The Fourth of July, Modern Philosophers. It’s not because I don’t like what the holiday represents, or because I don’t feel patriotic. On the contrary, I love what we celebrate on Independence Day. I will … Continue reading
Posted in Holidays, Humor
Tagged fireworks, Fourth of July, Humor, Independence Day, Modern Philosopher, PTSD, sarcasm, satire
19 Comments
Forty-Two
“What do you think this is all about?” Aaron asked before taking a sip of his Snapple. He continued to stare out at the river. It was a gorgeous summer day in Maine, the kind that almost made residents forget … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged best friends, flash fiction, Humor, Modern Philosopher, Philosophy, sarcasm, satire, short story
7 Comments
The Second Coming (Of The Contractor)
Twelve years of Catholic schooling taught me the importance of faith, Modern Philosophers. So even after my hopes for new windows at The House on the Hill were dashed by the $43,000 estimate for them to be installed, I did … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged home improvements, Humor, Modern Philosopher, money, sarcasm, satire, windows
5 Comments
Are My Batteries Rechargeable?
I decided to take the day off and have a three day weekend, Modern Philosophers, which means you get to enjoy a bonus Friday blog post. Of course, I couldn’t get away from people before someone inevitably asked if I … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged alone time, Humor, introvert, life, Modern Philosopher, sarcasm, satire, vacation
6 Comments
The Windows To My Bankruptcy
“You look angry,” Holly pointed out as she watched Aaron sip his Snapple. “I can see it in your eyes, and the eyes are the windows to the soul.” She smiled. He did not. It was a beautiful day along … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged best friends, home improvements, Humor, Modern Philosopher, Relationships, sarcasm, satire, short story, windows
5 Comments
Biden’s European Apology Tour A Huge Success
The results are in, Modern Philosophers, and President Joe Biden’s recent trip to apologize to European leaders for his predecessor’s behavior has been declared a huge success! Sure, the cover story was that President Biden was traveling to Europe for … Continue reading
Posted in Humor, Politics
Tagged G7 Summit, Humor, Modern Philosopher, Politics, President Biden, sarcasm, satire, world leaders
5 Comments
The $43,000 Question
What would you do with $43,000, Modern Philosophers? It’s not a trick question, and there are no wrong answers. I’m just curious how you would spend that amount of money if you had it. I know it’s an odd amount, … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged economics, home improvement, Humor, life, Modern Philosopher, money, sarcasm, satire, windows
18 Comments
What Do Ducks Think?
Martha and Mildred were octogenarians and lifelong Mainers, who loved walking along the river whenever the weather allowed. “Look, there’s that cute couple we see every Sunday,” Martha pointed out to her best friend. “They look like they really love … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged best friends, Humor, Love, Modern Philosopher, outward appearances, Relationships, sarcasm, satire, short story
14 Comments