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© Austin Hodgens and The Return of the Modern Philosopher, 2012-2023. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Austin Hodgens and The Return of the Modern Philosopher with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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Tag Archives: snowman
The Curious Snowman
Two snowmen stood in the middle of a field. Don’t worry, they were more than six feet apart, and doing their best to maintain strict social distancing. “Do you ever wonder if Santa Claus has a Santa Claus?” the one … Continue reading
Posted in Christmas, Humor
Tagged Christmas, flash fiction, Humor, Modern Philosopher, Santa Claus, Sarcasm, satire, short story, snowman
5 Comments
In The Meadow, We Can Build A Fashionable Snowman
Lewis stared at his creation, and then over at his date. While Gretchen was, by far, the more attractive of the two, he could not keep his eyes off of the Snowman he had just built. Okay, it was technically … Continue reading
Posted in Humor, Love, Philosophy, Writing
Tagged first date, first impressions, Humor, Modern Philosopher, Relationships, Romance, Sarcasm, satire, self doubt, short story, snowman
33 Comments
Using My Psychic Powers To Thwart A Vulcan Invasion
Winter Storm Vulcan arrived in Maine a few hours earlier than expected, Modern Philosophers. The office is always abuzz when a blizzard hits. Everyone is a little nervous, we all grow concerned, and no one really wants to deal with … Continue reading
Posted in Humor, Philosophy
Tagged Blizzard, Humor, Modern Philosopher, Sarcasm, satire, snow, snowman, Spock, Star Trek, Winter Storm Vulcan
13 Comments
The Snowman Of Death And/Or Foreboding
Today ended up being a typical Monday, Modern Philosophers, despite my thoughts to the contrary in this morning’s post. We need to jump into the Time Machine for this post to make sense. Saturday afternoon, I walked over to Fat … Continue reading
Posted in Humor, Philosophy
Tagged headless snowman, Humor, Ichabod Crane, Modern Philosopher, paranoia, Sarcasm, satire, Snow Miser, snowman
8 Comments
The Snowman Diet
Hey, Mr. Snowman! Do you mind If I say You are Looking Really good Lately? I remember You used To be So obese, And I worried About your Health. Lately, though, I can’t help But notice That you’ve Dropped A … Continue reading
Posted in Humor, Philosophy, Poetry
Tagged diet, Fitness, Humor, irony, Modern Philosopher, poem, Sarcasm, satire, snowman, weight loss, wit
7 Comments
Snowman Suicides Skyrocket In Maine As Warm Weather Persists
Winter can be a depressing time for humans, Modern Philosophers, but it has proven to be much worse for snowmen in Maine. As temperatures continue to hover in the 40s, the snow and ice have virtually vanished from sight. As … Continue reading
Posted in Humor, Philosophy
Tagged depressed, Humor, melting, Modern Philosopher, Sarcasm, satire, snowman, suicide, weather, wit
18 Comments
Frosty The Snowman Missing; Last Seen Arguing With Heat Miser
Frosty the Snowman might be a jolly, happy soul, Modern Philosophers, but right now he’s something else…missing! The world’s most famous Snowman was last seen on Saturday night at the North Pole’s Jack Frost Lounge, where Frosty had been celebrating … Continue reading
Posted in Christmas, Holidays, Humor, Philosophy
Tagged Christmas, crime, Frosty, Heat Miser, Humor, missing, Modern Philosopher, North Pole, Sarcasm, satire, snowman
13 Comments
Maine Snowman Sues For Religious Persecution
I’ve always said that snow was nothing but trouble, Modern Philosophers! My point was proven again today when a Bangor Snowman filed a lawsuit against Maine and the Federal Government for Religious Persecution. The Snowman, who refused to give his … Continue reading
Posted in Christmas, Humor
Tagged Christmas, Frosty, Humor, Modern Philosopher, Religion, Santa Claus, sarcasm, satire, snowman, winter
15 Comments