Tag Archives: Star Wars

Why Won’t The Aliens Come For Me?

Do you ever feel like you just don’t fit in, Modern Philosophers? That’s such a recurring sensation for me, that I actually panic if I ever begin to feel like I’m part of the crowd.  If I’m not on the … Continue reading

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Love Your Fellow Earthling

Aaron and Holly sat across the path from each other on their assigned benches.  It was a windy day along the river, so there wasn’t much foot traffic on the black top that separated them. Holly knew the silence wouldn’t … Continue reading

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Send In All The Clones

I’ve never been delusional enough, Modern Philosophers, to believe that the world was clamoring for multiple versions of me. One Austin might actually be too many in the opinion of some, but I’m certain no one wants that number increased. … Continue reading

Posted in Fitness, Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Wear A Mask In Public, This Is The Way

I’ve just finished watching The Mandalorian, Modern Philosophers. Not only was it highly entertaining, but it also taught me what to say to people who refuse to wear a mask in public: This is the way. For those of you … Continue reading

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Could Darth Vader Defeat Beta’s Walker Herd?

With all this free time on my hands, Modern Philosophers, I’ve spent countless hours wrestling with the great Philosophical debates of our time. Lately, I’ve grown bored with the great debates, and moved onto to other burning questions that really … Continue reading

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Trump Orders Jedi Arrested As States Merge Into Districts

Lately, Modern Philosophers, I feel like I’m living in the chaotic days before the cataclysmic events that lead to the birth of the dystopian societies in so many of the movies and books that I enjoy. I try to avoid … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

My Own Personal Death Star

A long time ago, in a neighborhood far, far away, a lonely boy sat in his bedroom in Brooklyn, and dreamed about growing up to be a Jedi Knight. That sad, lonely, nerdy boy was me, Modern Philosophers. You didn’t … Continue reading

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Do Go Chasing Waterfalls

Happy Labor Day, Modern Philosophers! This holiday, which has traditionally marked the end of summer, is actually the last day of my vacation. I’m not looking forward to rejoining the rat race tomorrow, but I definitely took advantage of this … Continue reading

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Trick or Treat or Time Travel

Justin exploded up off the couch excitedly the second he heard the knock at the front door. He loved Halloween, but rarely got any trick or treaters.  He didn’t understand why since he lived in a nice neighborhood.  The rumor … Continue reading

Posted in Holidays, Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

The Jedi Lawn Trick

“If you were to wake up tomorrow morning to discover that you had suddenly and mysteriously been blessed with Jedi powers, what’s the first thing you would do?” The Devil asked as he put down the Sunday edition of the … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 19 Comments