Tag Archives: time

A Tear In The Vacation Time/Space Continuum

Posted on September 2, 2019 by Austin

Science has never been my strong suit, Modern Philosophers, but I’ve always had this theory that time speeds up whenever I am on vacation. I think it has something to do with a tear in the space/time continuum, but don’t … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

After Dinner Mints: When Time Doesn’t Break

Posted on June 22, 2016 by Austin

Do you ever get the sense, Modern Philosophers, that time is standing still? It happens to me every Monday through Friday from 8:30am until 5:00pm.  My work day absolutely drags, and I swear that my employers are somehow messing with … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Love | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Time Travels

Posted on May 2, 2015 by Austin

An interested party Asked me Today Why I’d gotten Divorced. The question Threw me Because I hadn’t Thought about That event In quite some time. I answered That it had been So long That I couldn’t Even remember The reason. … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Love, Philosophy, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 16 Comments

The Devil Doesn’t Spring Ahead

Posted on March 8, 2015 by Austin

I returned to The House on the Hill sweaty, sore, and frustrated after my morning run. The last thing I needed was to discover The Devil, all slim and impeccably dressed in one of his tailored suits, sitting in my … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 13 Comments

I Advise You To Spring Ahead Immediately

Posted on March 8, 2015 by Austin

Dear Modern Philosopher, What time is it?  I’m so confused! Sincerely, Trapped In A Tear In The Space/Time Continuum Dear Trapped, Don’t panic.  You haven’t fallen through a tear in the space/time continuum. There’s a perfectly reasonable explanation for your … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 26 Comments

I Advise You To Let Time Fly

Posted on August 10, 2014 by Austin

Dear Modern Philosopher, I’m having trouble finding enough time in the day to get done all the things I want to do. Of course, I always find time for things that need to be done like going to work, mowing … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , , | 15 Comments

Friday Night Think Tank: That Time Of The Month Edition

Posted on March 14, 2014 by Austin

Happy Friday, Modern Philosophers! Do you realize that at this time next week, we will officially be in Spring?  As far as the Calendar Commission is concerned, Thursday is the first day of Spring.  In Maine, however, that season doesn’t … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 24 Comments

I Advise You To Spring Ahead And Buy An Alarm Clock

Posted on March 9, 2014 by Austin

Dear Modern Philosopher, I hope you get this email and choose to respond to it today because this is literally a time sensitive issue! I woke up this morning, checked the time on my cell phone, and decided to go … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Friday Night Think Tank: Spring Ahead Edition

Posted on March 7, 2014 by Austin

It’s Friday night, Modern Philosophers, and this is the weekend when we time travel.  Are you ready to spring ahead an hour? As we head off to the Think Tank tonight, we should form some Deep Thoughts on what it … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy | Tagged , , , , , , , | 14 Comments

Hey, Doc, Have You Got The Time?

Posted on November 12, 2013 by Austin

Hey, Doc, Have you got the time To help a guy in need? I cannot see the future Because I’m dwelling In the past. My insurance says You’re out of network But who can put a price On peace of … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Philosophy, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments