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© Austin Hodgens and The Return of the Modern Philosopher, 2012-2023. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Austin Hodgens and The Return of the Modern Philosopher with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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Tag Archives: winter
A Snow Angel You Are Not
I know the city snow plow driver is just doing his job, Modern Philosophers, but he has to understand that he has positioned himself to be thought of as my archenemy. Sure, the streets need to be cleared, but does … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged Humor, Maine, Modern Philosopher, Sarcasm, satire, shoveling snow, snow, snow plow, winter
9 Comments
Fight For Your Right To Hibernate
“I’ve come up with a solution for dealing with my hatred of winter,” Aaron announced smugly. It was the first Sunday of February. Temperatures in Maine were finally in the teens after being well below zero for over twenty-four hours. … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged hibernation, Humor, Modern Philosopher, polar vortex, Relationships, Sarcasm, satire, Science, winter
5 Comments
Maybe The Devil Was Right
Holy moly is it cold in Maine, Modern Philosophers! The mercury dipped below 0 at just before noon yesterday. It just now jumped from -17 to -15, which was the first rise in temperature in the last twenty hours. It … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged cold, Deal with the Devil, Humor, Maine, Modern Philosopher, polar vortex, Sarcasm, satire, winter
7 Comments
Blizzarding For The Seasonally Exhausted
I don’t know about you, Modern Philosophers, but I am so done with this winter. It has left me physically exhausted, mentally drained, and once again questioning my decision to willing live inside the universe’s most annoying snow globe. As … Continue reading
Losing My Frigidity
I am really starting to hate winter, Modern Philosophers. And for those smart asses who feel compelled to point out that I never should have moved to Maine if I hated winter, I will point out that I had a … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged coping skills, Humor, life, Maine, mental health, Modern Philosopher, Sarcasm, satire, single life, winter
18 Comments
Smashing Icicles Rejuvenates The Soul
If I were ever to write a Self Help book, Modern Philosophers, it would borrow the title of this blog post. As I discovered after work today, smashing icicles really does rejuvenate the soul. You can simply trust me on … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged coping skills, Humor, icicles, life hacks, Maine, Modern Philosopher, Sarcasm, satire, winter
6 Comments
Why Did I Move To The Arctic Circle?
“Why did I move to the Arctic Circle?” Aaron asked as he shivered on his bench on his side of the path. Holly sipped her coffee, stamped her feet to keep them warm, and stared across at her best friend … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged flash fiction, Humor, Maine, Modern Philosopher, Sarcasm, satire, short story, social distancing, winter
5 Comments
Where The Ice Finally Ends
Today, I discovered where the ice finally ends, Modern Philosophers, and it has given me hope. Not just hope that Spring is on its way, but also hope that life is looking up in general. Since I’m being both literal … Continue reading
Posted in Fitness, Humor
Tagged hope, Humor, life, Modern Philosopher, optimism, Philosophy, running, Sarcasm, satire, Spring, winter
10 Comments
Slip, Fall, Get Up, Repeat
We all slip and fall metaphorically, Modern Philosophers, and how we rebound from that adversity is very important. Does the same thing trip us up time and again? Do we let the misstep bother us, or do we learn from … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged adversity, bouncing back, Humor, life, Maine, Modern Philosopher, Philosophy, sarcasm, satire, winter
6 Comments
The Unrelenting Snow Globe
Thanks for all the messages, Modern Philosophers, asking me where I’ve vanished to since I haven’t blogged in ages. It’s nice to know someone would call the police to check The House on the Hill for a frozen corpse should … Continue reading
Posted in Humor
Tagged Amy Pond, cold, Doctor Who, Humor, Maine, missing in action, Modern Philosopher, sarcasm, satire, snow globe, winter
11 Comments