Not Many Rejects When Six Jokes Make It Onto The Air

RejectionHappy Sunday, Modern Philosophers!

I just finished watching last night’s new episode of The Nite Show With Danny Cashman.  Six of my jokes made it onto the air in the monologue, which is a new record for me.  Not bad, right?

I’m especially proud of the fact that two of the jokes Danny chose weren’t even on his list of suggested topics.  I just thought they’d be funny, so I wrote them and added them to my submissions.  One was about California Chrome failing to win the Triple Crown, and the other was about Harrison Ford getting injured on the set of the new Star Wars flick.  I managed to turned the latter into a joke about Obamacare.

Don’t worry, there are still some rejects to share.  No matter how many of my jokes make it onto the air, there will always be rejects because I try to submit two or three versions for every subject on Danny’s list.  So even if he does pick my joke about the Gubernatorial Race, there’s bound to be one that doesn’t make the cut because it’s very similar to the one that did get used in the monologue.

monologueI thought you’d enjoy this photo from the set.  I shows my California Chrome joke on the cue card.  Obviously, the joke is written in shorthand.  I assure you that the actual joke had verbs and made sense.

Let me share some of the jokes that didn’t get chosen, so that they can now have their moment in the sun…

The Los Angeles Kings won their second Stanley Cup in three years by defeating the New York Rangers 4-1. NY Mayor Bill de Blasio lost a bet to his LA counterpart, Eric Garcetti, and as a result, the Borough of Queens now has to be referred to as Kings for the next year…

Happy first day of Summer!  If you’re like me, you’re excited for the warmer weather, going on vacation, and trying to make it to Labor Day without seeing a single photo of Governor LePage in his speedo…

Eliot Cutler is so far behind in the polls for this year’s Gubernatorial Election that his numbers are now being counted towards the 2010 election…

The annual Moose Lottery was held last weekend.  Once again, the winning moose received one million dollars and a Florida beach house far away from Maine’s moose hunters…

Willie Nelson performed at the Bangor Waterfront Thursday night.  Police received reports of contact highs from as far away as Hermon…

nite logoWhat do you think, Modern Philosophers?  Did any of those jokes tickle your funny bone?

It’s pretty hard for me to be upset about jokes being left out of the monologue when I had six  make it onto TV, but every joke has a special place in my heart.  Or at the very least, a warm, cozy spot under my toga.

If you live in Maine, I hope you are tuning in to watch The Nite Show every Saturday night.  If you’re from away, as we call it here in Maine, you can always support the show by liking its Facebook page or by following it on Twitter @TheNiteShowME.

Let me know what you think about the lovely rejects…

About Austin

Native New Yorker who's fled to the quiet life in Maine. I write movies, root for the Yankees, and shovel lots of snow.
This entry was posted in Humor, Philosophy, Writing and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

14 Responses to Not Many Rejects When Six Jokes Make It Onto The Air

  1. grannyK says:

    You are on a roll! Why have they not hired you full time? That is my question!

  2. While not particularly in tune with Maine politics, the Gov. LePage speedo joke had personal meaning and made me chuckle. You see, there’s a neighbor with a body image problem, that insists on mowing his lawn in a speedo. The clicks from curtains and blinds being closed are deafening.

  3. ksbeth says:

    i like the governor/speedo one and am happy it’s a joke )

  4. Great jokes and very impressive! Writing jokes is much tougher than just writing humor.

    • Austin says:

      I’m starting to get the hang of it now, but I definitely agree with that. It’s even harder when you’re writing them for someone else and have to factor in his voice and such…

  5. I sorta feel bad for the moose and Willie, Austin. Loved those two.

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